T-Rex: If I feel bad, I'm not having a good time.
T-Rex: And if I feel happy, then I AM having a good time!
T-Rex: So like - is... is FEELING GOOD the purpose of life? If not literally, then at least PRACTICALLY?
T-Rex: So much of my life is built around minimizing my own suffering, trying to avoid feeling bad whenever possible. Could that REALLY be all there is to this?
Utahraptor: Welcome to Philosophy 101, buddy!
T-Rex: AW, DANG IT!
T-Rex: I KNEW this would require doing some friggin' RESEARCH. But the joke's on you - I don't find research pleasurable, and so I'm going to TOTALLY AVOID IT, thereby maximizing my short-term pleasure! But - huh, would SOME suffering be permissible to maximize OVERALL pleasure? And what if I look at others' happiness too?
Narrator: LATER, T-REX INVENTS UTILITARIANISM FROM FIRST PRINCIPLES:
T-Rex: Hah hah hah, joke's on you, losers! I never researched ANYTHING!!
Narrator: AND ALSO REMEMBERS HE ACTUALLY DID RESEARCH IT BACK IN 2005:
T-Rex: Oh yeahhhhhh
