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What are the haps my friends


August 22nd, 2013: HEY SPEAKING OF BODY HAIR, yesterday I shaved for the first time in several years! This is exciting for me but boring for most other people, so here's the wonderful Bee and Puppycat so you don't stop reading these posts down here due to extreme hair-based boredom.

To make sure the best gifts ever in time get to you when you want them, here are the HOLIDAY SHIPPING DEADLINES. Orders placed before these dates will get to you in time for Christmas!

December 1st-4th: All shipping methods except U.S.P.S. First-Class Package International Service™ are safe.
December 5th: International orders made not selecting U.S.P.S. Priority Mail Express International™ shipping will likely arrive in January.
December 10th: USPS FIRST CLASS and STANDARD may not make it in time and neither will USPS EXPRESS MAIL INTERNATIONAL.
December 14th: ALMOST NOTHING IS SAFE. USPS EXPRESS is the only safe USPS option. For FEDEX HOME/GROUND shipping it depends on where you are: refer to this map!
December 17th: A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE (IF THINGS PLACED ON OR AFTER THIS DATE ARRIVE BY THE 24TH, THAT IS)

One year ago today: short story: someone gets to the oceanic pole of inaccessibility, someone else is there, they both fall in love but get back to dry land and the magic is gone. sorry, that was a sad short story. it happens sometimes.

– Ryan

big ups and shouts out