August 5th, 2015 
I believe that this nation should commit itself to achieving the goal, before this decade is out, of allowing an overweight man to vomit up a perfectly good cheeseburger, and returning those burgers safely into the hands of the underweight.




The haps: This weekend I helped my parents launch a boat, and then they forgot to attach a rope to the boat, so I had to jump into the water fully clothed to swim out to the boat and stop it from crashing into ANOTHER boat!! Then I didn't even get to ride in the boat. TRUE STORY.

– Ryan

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