T-Rex: Teens: you want to go viral, right? Yeah you do. You lie in bed all night thinking "what are these new feelings I have, what's happening with my changing body, and how do I go friggin' viral??" TEENS: I have the answer.
T-Rex: Put it in your will, teens!
T-Rex: Check it out: "Whomsoever, in the space of one week after the announcement of this contest, gets the most retweets of a tweet praising me, shall get all my mad riches". DONE. Before you know it, people will be seeing "[YOUR NAME HERE] rules, RT if you agree" EVERYWHERE.
T-Rex: It's what I'm gonna do, teens! Believe me: I am a former teen myself!!
Utahraptor: But then you'll be dead and won't be around to enjoy the praise!
T-Rex: Ah, but that's the best part!
T-Rex: YOU FAKE YOUR DEATH. Then you return, and since you're alive the contest is nullified! But then in a twist the disgruntled people realize that if they kill you the will would go into effect again, so they all try to kill you, and your life segues into Die Hard so slowly you barely even notice.
T-Rex: ATTENTION TEENS! LISTEN TO YOUR ELDERS, WE HAVE 〚tiny〛 ideas for things that would be amazing if they happened to someone else and also 〚end tiny〛 REALLY GOOD ADVICE!
