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recent regrets

As Trump landed today he was greeted by Mariachi band, Juan Direction, armed with a wheelbarrow full of bricks
I want to dive into your ocean
Ryan's decision not to implement forced SSL meaning that the amazing Regret Index will probably be used at your treason trial, after which you will be taken out back and bludgeoned to death with like a dead lesbian or something equally grim
imagining President Trump and Prime Minister Farage or Gove or Fucktrumpet or whatever trying to negotiate a trade deal in which both come out on top
the sole consolation in the aftermath of Brexit is that when Trump is elected you won't have to go through another lonely Valentine's day, because of being dead in a nuclear holocaust
imagining that most of America is going to be frantically Googling who this "Donald Trump" guy everyone has been talking about on the morning of November ninth
The British are frantically Googling what the EU is, hours after voting to leave it
Five Hospitalized After Tony Robbins Urges Them to Walk Over Hot Coals
not being sure how many times you listened to "A Tiny Swampland, Eh, Sic" as a preteen
In a fifty two forty eight referendum this would be unfinished business by a long way
not being sure how many times you listened to "Can I Play With Madness" as a preteen
making America grate again
bringing your daughter, bringing your daughter, to the slaughter
Trump thanks him for the gesture, but says that he already has plenty
Starsuckers
Comedian Lee Nelson interrupts Donald Trump event in Scotland, handing out swastika emblazoned golf balls
Frexit
Spexit
the Biritsh public, chereoi
wondering why it is that whenever an American newspaper seeks celebrity comments on an issue related to the UK they always cite JK Rowling first, and wondering if the Biritsh public likewise holds Ms Rowling's opinions in such esteem
[ show all 116074 regrets ]

recent comments

(1) Rick Moranis
(1) Five Hospitalized After Tony Robbins Urges Them to Walk Over Hot Coals
(2) Starsuckers
(2) wondering why it is that whenever an American newspaper seeks celebrity comments on an issue related to the UK they always cite JK Rowling first, and wondering if the Biritsh public likewise holds Ms Rowling's opinions in such esteem
(1) Donald Trump praises Scots for "taking back control of their country" by voting overwhelmingly to remain in the EU
(4) Pokemon Life As a House and Star Wars
(1) the two cartoon dicks JMW Turner painted on The Slave Ship
(1) that coming five or six times in about thirty hours makes it so difficult to masturbate
(2) straddling Kento and pounding his bottom
(4) naming your daughter Rooney
[ show more ]

search regrets

Look for regrets involving

top regrets

kind of loving Gene Hunt, that magnificent bastard (1.0000)
the goddamn deliberately disabled modems Earthlink sent out to customers in the early aughts, cannot enable DHCP without "paying" extra, and using PPoE plus a router with DHCP disables streaming video, FU Earthlink (1.0000)
bragging about being from West Virginia (1.0000)
shows that only have eight episodes per season (1.0000)
regrets about pony blowing (1.0000)
[ show more ]

bottom regrets

not eating out Kento (0.0000)
pussy (0.0000)
arresting a king in his own palace (0.0000)
rubbing one out in the bathroom at church (0.0000)
sucking her left one until she had a breastgasm (0.0000)
shaving Jewel's bush, meow (0.0000)
having sex with a girl who looked a lot like Christina Ricci (0.0000)
brunettes (0.0000)
having impure thoughts about a teenage Kimmie Gibbler (0.0000)
licking Danish remoulade off of Chris Lydon's erect penis (0.0000)
smashing a birdhouse with your flaccid dick (0.0000)
bellowing DARKNESS MY OLD FRIEND (0.0000)
The Curious Cans of Benjamin Buttocks (0.0000)
twats (0.0000)
holding your boobs when you run down the stairs (0.0000)
masturbating with your cut off hand (0.0000)
sprinking chocolate chips on your beloved's breasts as you knead them (0.0000)
telling that girl in second grade who insisted that you were "the boss of her" to show you her vagina (0.0000)
not being Kento (0.0000)
slamming your dick in the car door (0.0000)
using the word "waffletastic" (0.0000)
stabbing Isabella Rossellini and ejaculating in the wound (0.0000)
telling the Philippines authorities that Kento is a drug mule (0.0000)
having Gordon Ramsay voice an orangutan who does nothing but masturbate and defecate (0.0000)
fisting Go Ikeda (0.0000)
humping Jewel's bust (0.0000)
stealing that girl's bra from the communal laundry room (0.0000)
teabagging Raymond Burr (0.0000)
killing the California girls (0.0000)
cornholing Willie Mays (0.0000)
turtles (0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (0.0004)
regret index greatest tits, Kento (0.0115)
breasts (0.0135)
buying multiple copies of the book "To Be or Not to Be" by the incredibly handsome New York Times bestselling author Ryan North (0.0161)
slamming your dick in Jewel's boobs (0.0185)
saying no when you should have said yes (0.0217)
having a lesbian crush on Alex Dainis (0.0233)
dongs (0.0297)
staring at Bicoid Babe's ass seriously (0.0310)
Twin Long Rods #Two (0.0345)
asian racks (0.0357)
fisting Kevin Bacon at home (0.0370)
hating reality TV shows (0.0385)
sexy makeouts (0.0400)
going to the Sweatiest Ass in the World world premiere with Kento (0.0408)
being awesome (0.0410)
going slightly out of your way to step on that crunchy looking leaf (0.0433)
consistent pubic lice (0.0455)
dinosaurs (0.0466)
Receiving from Jaylala (0.0476)
being the real deal (0.0526)
spooning Kento's boobs (0.0526)
breastfeeding (0.0526)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0541)
learning to play the xylophone (0.0543)
Allison Iraheta being voted off American Idol (0.0556)
how weird The Regret Index becomes at night (0.0556)
playing Dungeons & Dragons with Tim Duncan (0.0556)
being a nerd (0.0580)
drinking delicious lemonade and popping wheelies (0.0588)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0606)
building a castle out of the junk in a junkyard (0.0625)
boobs (0.0625)
demanding proof (0.0625)
managing to resist the perverse curiosity to see TwoGirlsOneCup, so far (0.0625)
making a fort in your living room out of couch cushions (0.0625)
this video (0.0667)
playing it loud (0.0704)
really not regretting the number one four two eight at all (0.0714)
sleeping with that slim ugly huge breasted double D cup bucktoothed seventeen year old national merit scolar bikini model cellist goth, and by the way, screw you MB (0.0714)
wondering what penguin would tase like (0.0714)
having to wear glasses (0.0714)
your love of eighties action movies (0.0727)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0732)
discovering webcomics (0.0746)
playing Dungeons & Dragons with Tim Duncan (0.0769)
not wearing panties (0.0769)
defending the bullied kid (0.0769)
futurama (0.0769)
getting FOUR fish hooks stuck in your scrotum (0.0769)
boobs, vaginas, asses, and such (0.0769)
choosing Squirtle (0.0769)
that Jewel has huge boobs, seriously (0.0769)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0811)
disabling your crazy friend (0.0833)
that walruses, goats, and swans represent the Leviathan, Behemoth, and Ziz, respectively, of the regret index (0.0833)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0833)
having beautiful breasts (0.0833)
Bicoid Babe (0.0833)
drinking champagne out of a chimp anus (0.0833)
soliciting a fourteen year old boy to pose for sexually explicit photographs (0.0833)
not supporting the President (0.0833)
dinosaur comics (0.0833)
cuddling (0.0833)
that wikipedia describes attending concerts as a "ritual" (0.0833)
"Allison Iraheta being voted off American Idol" being voted off the bottom regrets list (0.0833)
saying, "boners ahoy!" (0.0853)
kicking it old school (0.0870)
rocking out (0.0875)
staying in college (0.0879)
sharing warm spiced cider with a loved one (0.0891)
wondering if so many ladies turn to writing and reading smut because they crave porn but get turned off by the way it's made (0.0909)
Bicoid Babe (0.0909)
Squirtle (0.0909)
indulging your nerd side (0.0909)
garlic (0.0909)
Digimon (0.0909)
questioning your sexuality (0.0909)
suckling (0.0909)
hugging a tree like a dirty hippie (0.0909)
NOT kneeling before Zod (0.0909)
nomming a hamburger (0.0909)
baking bread (0.0909)
making waffles (0.0918)
moving out of your parent's house (0.0941)
treehouses (0.0952)
holding hands (0.0952)
fun times involving sushi (0.0959)
playing videogames while drunk (0.0962)
learning another language (0.0962)
publicly mocking Swine Flu (0.0970)
dromiceiomimus (0.0976)
drinking delicious lemonade (0.0982)
butts (0.0991)
growing up in a nonchurchgoing family (0.1000)
not having seen Muriel's Wedding (0.1000)
sitting on the floor in second grade (0.1000)
less than three (0.1000)
buying a Dinosaur Comics tshirt (0.1017)
sleeping naked (0.1026)
defending cream soda (0.1062)
saying 'boners ahoy' (0.1064)
putting punctuation in your comment (0.1067)
the last time you drank (0.1071)
the very last thing you said (0.1071)
opening new cider (0.1077)
going to lunch (0.1111)
spending all weekend naked (0.1111)
following that white rabbit (0.1111)
having seen Star Wars all the through probably over a hundred times (0.1111)
that stuff getting eaten is inherently funny (0.1111)
hugging a tree like a koala (0.1111)
the death of Margaret Hilda Thatcher (0.1111)
kissing (0.1116)
becoming an atheist (0.1124)
getting into firefly (0.1126)
World War Two's ending in Allied victory (0.1129)
party party partying hard (0.1136)
starting over (0.1143)
being meat (0.1143)
eating raised bread (0.1154)
closing the door (0.1154)
smoking weed (0.1154)
boners (0.1156)
friendship (0.1167)
spending an evening eating spicy cheetos, reading language log, and masturbating to nude photos of your ex from five years ago (0.1176)
the little wiggly things at the end of feet (0.1176)
making a little space for the cheese slices (0.1176)
downloading music illegally (0.1176)
that rachel is back (0.1176)
drinking your first drink (0.1183)
getting your hot cocoa on (0.1200)
skipping work to sit in the sun (0.1200)
accepting candy from strangers (0.1204)
the color of blood outside the body when one has iron based blood (0.1212)
thinking of rain (0.1212)
ryan north (0.1226)
drinking a cold beer in the shower (0.1228)
Voting for Barak Obama (0.1228)
breathing (0.1239)
hating family guy almost as soon as it was uncanceled (0.1250)
that you tend to give money to buskers or not depending on their talent (0.1250)
not meeting Emily Gray (0.1250)
reading the book that changed everything (0.1250)
popping wheelies with the boys (0.1275)
winning (0.1287)
watching Mystery Science Theatre all night (0.1304)
that groove is in the heart (0.1304)
having sex at seventeen (0.1304)
vandalizing Wikipedia's chicken page that one time (0.1304)
Getting into Miles Davis (0.1304)
talking to strangers (0.1311)
not getting the chance to meet the Mets (0.1311)
free speech (0.1316)
voting (0.1324)
eating goat cheese (0.1333)
Zooey Deschanel looks like a sandblasted Lucy Lawless (0.1333)
not installing Safari Three on all your computers yet (0.1333)
attempting to lucid dream (0.1333)
flushing that gallon of rotten shrimp down the toilet (0.1333)
obama (0.1348)
taking AP classes (0.1349)
loving Batman (0.1351)
qwantz (0.1356)
making mud soup as a kid (0.1364)
making out with that girl dressed as a French maid at that costume party (0.1364)
kissing her (0.1364)
being one of the very few people in your circle of friends to never really have the urge to smoke cigarettes (0.1389)
singing along (0.1395)
lasers (0.1395)
not wringing your parent's neck (0.1400)
not having kids (0.1408)
skipping the Harry Potter midnight release (0.1413)
having erotic fantasies about Bob Dylan (0.1429)
going hog wild (0.1429)
not going to freecreditreport dot com (0.1429)
polydactyl cats (0.1429)
eating roast beef off of your own boobs (0.1429)
sexy spaceships (0.1429)
What is this I don't even (0.1429)
having impure thoughts about a teenage Winona Rider (0.1429)
not boning a donkey (0.1429)
making out with that girl who turned out to still be in high school (0.1429)
liking michael showalter a lot (0.1429)
kicking everyone's butt (0.1429)
ap classes (0.1429)
in jokes (0.1429)
being a rocker (0.1429)
I don't know, always kind of liking narwhals yourself (0.1429)
paying for a whole seat but only using the edge (0.1429)
that for every n in N there is a finite sequence a subscript k, of which every member is in Z and is nonnegative, such that the product for i from one to m, where m is the length of the sequence, of p subscript i to the power of a subscript i equals n (0.1429)
dropping your first truth and beauty bomb (0.1429)
putting your jeans and socks in one load (0.1429)
losing your virginity (0.1429)
growing long hair (0.1453)
living abroad (0.1477)
not being pretentious enough (0.1481)
sexing her hardcore (0.1481)
all those books you read (0.1481)
breaking bones while snowboarding (0.1481)
passing yourself off as royalty (0.1500)
spending an entire weekend in your pjs (0.1500)
blowing raspberries (0.1500)
being a meatatarian (0.1500)
eating vaguely european (0.1500)
accepting a lower paying but much less stressfull job (0.1505)
burning that motherfucker down (0.1515)
breaking the law (0.1522)
going to the gym (0.1524)
sneaking around in a cardboard box, Metal Gear style (0.1538)
keeping on trucking (0.1538)
physically assaulting that guy who can't even bother to tune in the easy listening station properly in his cubicle (0.1538)
deep throating Stephen Fry (0.1538)
The Middleman being cancelled (0.1538)
that you always liked Mike more than Joel (0.1538)
that "bottom regrets" and "most voted regrets" are white while "add a new regret" "search regrets" "recent regrets" "top regrets" and "recent comments" are all in blue (0.1538)
wearing two socks (0.1538)
pie (0.1538)
Being born (0.1543)
trying that exotic food (0.1544)
telling your parents you're an atheist (0.1552)
not kissing up to people, even if it's in your best interest to do so (0.1556)
memorising every Star Trek episode (0.1557)
keeping it real (0.1557)
getting drunk at a wedding (0.1579)
that "avril lavigne" in Canadia is a line of spring fresh canuck bidets (0.1579)
learning an instrument (0.1587)
gay (0.1587)
having a power level of over NINE THOUSAND (0.1591)
eating in a rad mood (0.1600)
reading the regret index (0.1613)
eating bread (0.1622)
the indescribable beauty of simplicity (0.1622)
wikipedia (0.1622)
eating meat (0.1628)
playing Starfox Sixty Four (0.1647)
how many times you went back over the archive for Dinosaur comics (0.1648)
Pretending to be asleep to avoid talking (0.1649)
visiting this website (0.1656)
always eating your skittles in prismatic order (0.1667)
busting myths (0.1667)
being in a rad mood (0.1667)
eating left handed (0.1667)
having roast beef (0.1667)
chrono trigger (0.1667)
eating her out (0.1667)
cheese (0.1667)
sweetness (0.1667)
clockwork (0.1667)
pudding (0.1667)
christmas (0.1667)
refusing to accept the modern sense of "tweet" into your vocabulary (0.1667)
watching 'The Dark Knight' (0.1667)
meeting a possum (0.1667)
randomly meeting people who fill your heart with glee (0.1667)
just wanting a sign (0.1667)
being the one kid in your nerd clique who instantly hated Return of the Jedi with a passion (0.1667)
being able to say 'when I was your age, pluto was a planet' (0.1695)
playing in traffic (0.1696)
being British (0.1698)
not switching to Geico (0.1712)
having eaten dinner (0.1714)
having a onesome (0.1717)
hugging a tree (0.1719)
ghosts (0.1724)
dancing naked ALL DAY LONG (0.1739)
listening to Wagner (0.1739)
neing a super freak super freak (0.1739)
wondering whether Kento, Document, Sarah, and Pseudonym have found the new regret index yet (0.1739)
not waxing your eyebrows in high school (0.1748)
that where we're going we don't need roads (0.1748)
preparing for the zombie apocalypse (0.1750)
a log cabin (0.1757)
staying up all night to watch the sun rise (0.1757)
planning for the zombie attack (0.1765)
Garfield Minus Garfield (0.1765)
getting a lick job from a trannie hooker in the dumpster behind Steak n Shake (0.1765)
thinking of lettuce as just a delivery system for salad dressing (0.1765)
eating a huge nerd (0.1765)
dessert (0.1765)
putting on your robe and wizard hat (0.1765)
not being one of those women who instantly fawn over babies (0.1765)
loving lamp (0.1771)
having a crush on the Utahraptor (0.1773)
peanut butter (0.1778)
that Venn diagramming is your favorite type of diagramming (0.1786)
painting the bedroom a color other than white or offwhite (0.1789)
not smoking (0.1795)
that the Index is back, and the old users are back, and it is amazing nostalgic times for all (0.1795)
bacon (0.1795)
still knowing the lyrics to eighties pop songs (0.1795)
insisting on protection (0.1795)
using the word "substitute" as a substitute for "replacement" (0.1818)
dancing naked (0.1818)
brownies (0.1818)
trying to convince someone you are their Tyler Durden (0.1818)
watching the sunrise (0.1818)
camping (0.1818)
losing yourself and dreaming of world that lie between her fingers (0.1818)
simple english wikipedia (0.1818)
that, in a way, David Carradine's death from autoerotic asphyxiation could properly be termed "a fatal stroke" (0.1818)
hot bondage (0.1818)
eating a huge marshmallow (0.1818)
wondering whether a centaur foal would suckle from the human breasts or the horse teats underneath (0.1818)
lullabies (0.1818)
pronouncing "Intelligentsia" with a hard G (0.1818)
that you wonder if rachel would be in your klan or hoard or guild or whatever when the pokemon mmorpg comes out (0.1818)
bringing up your distaste for Disney music (0.1818)
streaking (0.1818)
recognizing the beauty of mathematics and logic (0.1818)
ever reading books (0.1818)
lovin' dem pizza rolls (0.1818)
not really liking MMORPGs (0.1818)
spending the Fourth in someone else's country (0.1818)
not eating goats for a living (0.1818)
road trips (0.1818)
buying food for homeless people (0.1825)
not living in Corvallis, Oregon (0.1835)
washing your pet (0.1837)
yelling "in bed" at the end of fortune cookie fortunes (0.1837)
fry (0.1842)
hot snogging (0.1842)
drawing penises on the worksheet (0.1842)
listening to Beethoven (0.1852)
standing the test of time (0.1852)
being an alligator (0.1852)
having a huge internet crush on Kate Beaton (0.1852)
having a huge weiner (0.1852)
going to college (0.1852)
being the bee's knees (0.1860)
not knowing every ABBA song by heart, yet (0.1860)
donating to public radio (0.1860)
feeling that Pepe is the cutes BYOB corner pet (0.1875)
iTunes somehow playing the same song around the same time every day despite being on shuffle (0.1875)
watching Captain Planet (0.1875)
not joining the military (0.1875)
living in the city (0.1875)
eating a butterfinger (0.1875)
wanting to be under the sea, in an octopus's garden, in the shade (0.1875)
using the word "retarded" as a replacement for "stupid" (0.1875)
foreplay (0.1875)
being real and fantastic (0.1875)
chocolate spread (0.1875)
not knowing more about Anonymous (0.1875)
wearing white after Labor Day (0.1875)
the metric system (0.1878)
giving that dorky, but really sweet guy a chance (0.1885)
dowloading that song (0.1887)
choosing adventure over security (0.1892)
dinosaur wrestling (0.1892)
that the sea is deep and full of mystery (0.1905)
having a name that is fifty percent vowels (0.1905)
not actually being bitter or a nihilist (0.1905)
eating a noun (0.1905)
choosing cake instead of death (0.1905)
hooking up words and phrases and clauses (0.1905)
being the cat's meow (0.1905)
taking boat (0.1905)
shooting Scott Temple (0.1905)
waiting most of the morning for the time to roll around when you can go to lunch at the most awesome hot dog place ever (0.1905)
bondage (0.1923)
not watching the movie Pontypool (0.1923)
being afraid of Americans (0.1923)
telling your mother you don't want to have children (0.1923)
this picture (0.1923)
milk (0.1935)
holding cats (0.1935)
earning a PhD instead of an MD (0.1935)
pretending you're a woman to get into nursing school (0.1935)
learning new and interesting things about skin and blood (0.1935)
drawing a webcomic (0.1947)
saving up some money (0.1951)
reading pictures for sad children (0.1951)
not seeing Nicolas Cage after seeing Face Off (0.1951)
signing up for Twitter (0.1992)
a glorious fart (0.2000)
flipping off everyone you hated from high school (0.2000)
delicious ice cream (0.2000)
dandelion wine (0.2000)
revealing your nerdiness (0.2000)
buying the newer model (0.2000)
making pies (0.2000)
going on a bicycle tour (0.2000)
busting through the heavens with your drill (0.2000)
that larder is a pretty neat, word, a holdover whose anachronistic meaning specifically meant a COLD storage room, but post refrigeration came to mean simply a pantry, but it could also mean a supply of food, the thing itself (0.2000)
how awesome broiling is (0.2000)
British English (0.2000)
hooking up with ryan (0.2000)
not having played Kingdom Hearts yet (0.2000)
losing your religion (0.2000)
masturbating at a Jessica Alba movie (0.2000)
being the hottest item on the regret index (0.2000)
that crazy night in Pheonix (0.2000)
finally taking a chance and talking to him or her (0.2000)
someday wanting to own land, with fruit growing on that land (0.2000)
getting over your ex so quickly (0.2000)
jumping in that lake (0.2022)
buying a Mac (0.2027)
not going to dartmouth (0.2034)
making love to your hand (0.2035)
extra sprinkles (0.2037)
Fictional Jimbo Wales (0.2041)
being bigger on the inside (0.2045)
listening to the whole CD (0.2051)
giving a gift as a surprise (0.2055)
liking folk rock (0.2059)
finding the key to the secret garden (0.2059)
mARRIAGE (0.2059)
experimenting with new and interesting sandwich fillings (0.2065)
running with scissors (0.2065)
swallowing (0.2069)
the Lord of the Rings (0.2079)
singing Bohemian Rhapsody at the top of your lungs (0.2083)
the resurrection of the regret index (0.2083)
being mean to the neighbor's rude kid (0.2083)
changing your cell phone number (0.2083)
spending two hours on the phone with your grandmother (0.2083)
ever reading that first comic strip on the Web (0.2083)
thanksgiving (0.2086)
not going to prom (0.2088)
wearing a tshirt with a dinosaur on it to a dinosaur museum (0.2105)
pancakes (0.2105)
sleeping for thirteen hours (0.2105)
turning it up to eleven (0.2105)
being Witty (0.2105)
xkcd (0.2105)
correcting your friends everytime they misspell Dromiceiomimus (0.2105)
wanting to take a girl under your arm (0.2105)
the Dromiceiomimus' improbable colouring (0.2105)
magic (0.2105)
Dinosaur Comics' new layout (0.2105)
eating cows (0.2105)
staying up all night to watch an eighteen year old paint her nails online (0.2115)
watching the Donald Duck cartoon "Die Fuhrer's Face" (0.2121)
buying a motorcycle (0.2121)
playing chess (0.2121)
donating (0.2121)
feeling closer to people in this world of regret (0.2121)
post it notes (0.2128)
switching parties (0.2128)
what you did last Friday night (0.2135)
using words that are not really words (0.2143)
not killing every faggot I've ever seen in my entire life (0.2143)
lying on a futon (0.2143)
facial hair (0.2143)
wondering, if the death machine was made of organic technology, could it predict its own death (0.2143)
chocolate (0.2143)
making your time (0.2143)
wondering if we can get back up to forty thousand regrets in a year's time (0.2143)
the invention of custard (0.2143)
going to market (0.2143)
Monty Python (0.2143)
being really cool (0.2143)
air guitar (0.2143)
eating pizza (0.2143)
listening to music that no one else has heard of (0.2143)
jerking off into your roommate's shampoo bottle, not just once but every day for like two weeks (0.2143)
going to university (0.2143)
disagreeing with things (0.2143)
being the lazer viking (0.2143)
that consomme is broth with will (0.2143)
listening to music at a much higher or lower volume than what the artist intended (0.2143)
Jack Kerouac (0.2143)
using hugs, not drugs (0.2157)
going to the beach alone (0.2157)
being American (0.2160)
knowing why the caged bird sings (0.2162)
telling your brother he was adopted (0.2174)
eating a tasty salad (0.2174)
taking care of knives (0.2174)
this place smelling like brownies all of the sudden (0.2174)
not eating Pizza Hut pizza (0.2174)
punching that baby, despite it's rude behavior (0.2174)
giggling over a heart's warm cockles (0.2174)
ephemera (0.2174)
purposely deceiving someone who never listens to what you have to say (0.2182)
following Stephen Fry on Twitter (0.2192)
the death of Clippy (0.2200)
missing the NBA playoffs to watch the new episode of 'Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmern' (0.2203)
almost always using the British spellings for things, even though you are an American and your spell check always tells you it's wrong (0.2206)
shooting a man in Reno just to watch him die (0.2211)
fighting the Nausican (0.2222)
painting your fingernails lime green (0.2222)
major tom (0.2222)
PIN numbers (0.2222)
sending the President into exile (0.2222)
being Anonymous (0.2222)
pictures for sad children (0.2222)
Loosing you religion or faith (0.2222)
getting a tattoo (0.2222)
looking at pictures of adorable puppies (0.2222)
becoming vegetarian or vegan (0.2222)
good times (0.2222)
feeding the ducks (0.2222)
volunteering (0.2222)
being too awesome (0.2222)
tiger's belly (0.2222)
explaining to someone what the Regret Index is (0.2222)
wondering what the significance of the qwantz dot com domain name is (0.2222)
raspberries, om nom nom (0.2222)
playing dress up (0.2222)
crying during the first ten minutes of the new Star Trek movie (0.2241)
stealing the enterprise (0.2241)
dancing all crazy (0.2250)
xylophones (0.2250)
EXISTING (0.2254)
escaping out the back (0.2258)
spreading your legs (0.2258)
takin it to the streets (0.2273)
cooking bacon (0.2273)
ATM machines (0.2273)
staying on the phone all night (0.2273)
tapirs (0.2273)
cut and pasting a webcomic (0.2273)
making love above the pub (0.2273)
quitting even though the job was OK, but just OK (0.2273)
writing slashfiction about webcomic authors (0.2286)
a lifetime dedicated to public displays of air guitar (0.2286)
not settling down when all your friends did (0.2286)
what happened in vegas (0.2286)
wondering if there's a way to extract all of these autofill regrets into a text file for saving and possibly choosing the better ones (0.2286)
optical illusions (0.2292)
the internet (0.2293)
stories about elves and unicorns (0.2308)
not knowing who Richard Dawkins is (0.2308)
birth control (0.2308)
having an adolescent crush on Christopher Walken (0.2308)
reading every single Dinosaur Comic from beginning to end in a single sitting (0.2308)
filling your thesis with references to monkeys (0.2308)
preferring women with body hair over women who shave (0.2308)
having a cute little white butt (0.2308)
playing god (0.2308)
running away from indie cred, even though you listen to some of the music (0.2308)
puttin' on the ritz (0.2308)
reproducing via meiosis (0.2308)
leaving a legacy (0.2308)
a French guy who looks like Janice Dickinson wearing a strap on under a fancy ball gown, just to piss off his rich bitch girlfriend and her annoying family (0.2308)
vaguely effeminate dancing frogs (0.2308)
that dreaming is free (0.2308)
eating lunch yesterday (0.2308)
extra cheese (0.2308)
the general awesomeness of blacklights (0.2308)
eating cheese just for the sake of eating cheese (0.2308)
having an affair with the flirty executive assistant (0.2308)
being a pantyaire, like a millionaire but with panties instead of money (0.2308)
actually finding pigeons more cute than vermin like (0.2308)
being your mother's child (0.2308)
not having a penis (0.2308)
horseshoe crabs (0.2308)
that you like pie quite a bit (0.2308)
going to Spain (0.2308)
buying a chocolate bar without checking the label first, only to find it had peanuts in it (0.2320)
spending a whole bunch of time reading random articles on wikipedia (0.2326)
that your delicious cheeseburger was made from a cow whose cause of death was predicted by an infallible machine (0.2326)
chewing bubblegum (0.2326)
learning all the elements in the periodic table in order (0.2328)
getting a credit card (0.2329)
referring to water as hydrogen hydroxide, as a means to both achieve maximal accuracy from the perspective of how the atoms are actually connected, and freaking people out (0.2333)
getting out of bed this morning (0.2333)
your haircut (0.2333)
Grad school (0.2336)
only that you have but one life to give for your country (0.2340)
log cabin (0.2340)
sticking with your major (0.2340)
spending an entire day listening to the same song on repeat (0.2348)
writing the letter "x" backwards and upsidedown (0.2353)
tapping her mana (0.2353)
comitting massive regret vote fraud (0.2353)
growing a handlebar moustache (0.2353)
eating food that are high in potastium (0.2353)
deep frying boring healthy food (0.2353)
anonymity (0.2353)
thinking that dinosaur might be good to eat, depending on the species, but wondering if the size of the animal would effect the texture of the meat or something like that (0.2353)
paying for something with fifteen dollars in quarters (0.2353)
retiring early (0.2353)
tricking a straight guy into dating another straight guy (0.2353)
the moon (0.2353)
eating babies (0.2353)
going to church (0.2353)
dancing with the devil in the pale moon light (0.2353)
wearing hipster glasses (0.2360)
leaving the farm (0.2368)
irony (0.2368)
getting hooked on Harry Potter or Twilight (0.2375)
shit son, I don't know (0.2381)
ice cream (0.2381)
studying linguistics (0.2381)
adding this to StumbleUpon (0.2381)
being the latest in nerd technology (0.2381)
making fun of people who instigate fights in YouTube's comments section (0.2381)
buying a Wii (0.2381)
reading, that shit is crazy (0.2381)
doing it for the lulz (0.2386)
Skipping the Fiance's family Easter Dinner to play xbox and go to a concert (0.2389)
missing Efterklang at the Dublin Docklands (0.2400)
inventing a maneuver (0.2400)
losing your religion, like in that one song (0.2400)
falling in love (0.2400)
Paris (0.2400)
airing out your nughty bits (0.2400)
impersonating that person (0.2400)
going to an Ivy League school (0.2400)
broken broccoli (0.2400)
helvetica (0.2400)
trying something new (0.2404)
orthodontics (0.2407)
penis (0.2407)
using flesh for digestive energy (0.2411)
Dresden Codak (0.2414)
still knowing the lyrics to nineties pop songs (0.2414)
not being on fire (0.2418)
my high GPA in high school (0.2418)
nothing (0.2421)
smoking pot (0.2421)
going through a Bob Marley phase in college, like EVERYONE else (0.2424)
love (0.2424)
tweed jackets with leather elbow patches (0.2429)
asking her out (0.2435)
the english alphabet (0.2436)
turning up at Ryan's door covered in mustard (0.2449)
giving up eating mammals (0.2460)
rereading all the harry potter books (0.2462)
dating someone much younger (0.2474)
breaking up with my first love (0.2482)
speaking in spoonerisms (0.2500)
being born during the hot war (0.2500)
considering eating two dollars and fifty cents worth of raspberries in one sitting (0.2500)
using my mom's deodorant (0.2500)
thinking someone was hot just because they were good at maths (0.2500)
yogurt's laxative properties (0.2500)
not giving David Gwilliam kisses before he got married (0.2500)
the existence of the interrobang! (0.2500)
having sexy intestines (0.2500)
line dancing while drunk (0.2500)
ira glass vs philip glass in "glass warfare" (0.2500)
a clandestine meating (0.2500)
eating a minimalist (0.2500)
girls, ewwwwww (0.2500)
knowing she was gay and still dating her (0.2500)
being crazy and or retarded (0.2500)
getting a liberal arts education (0.2500)
not having balls (0.2500)
wondering what kind of girl would be impressed with somebody smoking, it doesn't seem that difficult to do (0.2500)
all of the weird things you are a fan of (0.2500)
knowing you created one of the bottom regrets (0.2500)
hugging a koala (0.2500)
your sudden urge to make brownies (0.2500)
correcting people on their improper use of the subjunctive (0.2500)
licking out a feminist (0.2500)
taking the boat (0.2500)
making fun of fat swans (0.2500)
that Japanese people LOVE coelacanths (0.2500)
your very existence (0.2500)
deep fat frying a twinkie (0.2500)
wondering what goes through their little kitty brains (0.2500)
the simpsons (0.2500)
a b a a b a b b b a b a a a a b b a b a b a a b b a a b b b a a b b a b b b a b b a b a a a b b b b b a a b b b a a a b a b a b a b a b b a b a a b b a b b a a a a b a b a b a a b b a b b a b a b b b a a b b a a b b a b b a b b b a a a b a b a b a b b a a (0.2500)
sexual congress (0.2500)
falling in love with the majesty of colors (0.2500)
English (0.2500)
being scared of Kefka (0.2500)
tickling her THERE (0.2500)
books (0.2500)
having sex with your boss' underage daughter (0.2500)
that English is your fourth language and you speak it better than your first but not your second (0.2500)
underboob (0.2500)
being a huge nerd (0.2500)
deliberately misunderstanding offensive slang by taking it literally, ie assume when someone says 'faggot' that they refer to a bundle of sticks or twigs (0.2500)
girls with full lips and wide hips (0.2500)
that aloe plants are awesome (0.2500)
having low pop culture IQ (0.2500)
being The One (0.2500)
the Pythagorean theorem (0.2500)
being necessarily clever (0.2500)
trolling the UK government petition site with stupid petitions you know would be rejected (0.2500)
lesbians (0.2500)
Ryan getting the Regret Index back up (0.2500)
never dealing drugs (0.2500)
fluffy cats (0.2500)
that you never had a chance to tell Farty McCrablice that YOU LOVE HIM (0.2500)
living and learning (0.2500)
ever saying "no fat chicks" (0.2500)
answering the telephone in a foreign language (0.2500)
life being so tasty (0.2500)
the first time you got drunk (0.2500)
getting divorced (0.2500)
going the extra mile (0.2500)
socializing instead of playing video games (0.2527)
eating mexican food (0.2540)
unpacking my adjectives (0.2542)
dyeing your hair (0.2545)
not googling The Underfold (0.2554)
chromatic scales (0.2558)
being (0.2558)
wishing you could give yourself a blowie (0.2564)
tang (0.2564)
not listening to Billy Zane (0.2564)
not trying alcohol sooner (0.2564)
sexy times with a friend (0.2570)
not knowing what the big deal with Twitter is (0.2571)
being a socialist (0.2571)
telling him you had feelings for him even though you really didn't know whether he'd reciprocate (0.2581)
quoting that xkcd comic (0.2581)
puppy dawgs (0.2581)
going back for seconds on dessert (0.2582)
eating macademia nuts (0.2593)
painting your fingernails black (0.2593)
being a Shakespeare nerd (0.2593)
lying about how spicy it was (0.2593)
eating tofu (0.2595)
the final countdown (0.2600)
eating all the royalty (0.2609)
eating out a feminist (0.2609)
bursting out into evil laughter in a crowded or public place (0.2609)
eating that piece of chocolate (0.2609)
throwing your underwear onto the stage (0.2609)
going to graduate school (0.2614)
having known love (0.2619)
learning lisp (0.2619)
reading through the entire dinosaur comics archive and then talking like Ryan for the next month (0.2619)
starting that fire (0.2619)
living on the edge (0.2632)
being vaguely european (0.2632)
cooking hamburgers on my engine block (0.2632)
giving your best when you know it won't be enough (0.2632)
being there for her when she needed you (0.2632)
going commando (0.2632)
everything (0.2632)
eating that cookie out of the trash (0.2632)
taking comfort in the regret index in any way whatsoever (0.2632)
writing a novel (0.2632)
wondering what kind of feelings different animals feel (0.2632)
your twisted desires (0.2632)
being winsome (0.2632)
sexuality (0.2632)
polygamy (0.2632)
selling myself to science (0.2632)
wanting gummi bears and or banana chips right now (0.2632)
that shorts are comfy and easy to wear (0.2647)
insisting on precision (0.2656)
responding with Sassy Molassy (0.2658)
alligators in the sewer (0.2667)
letting her sit in the front seat (0.2667)
reading through the entire dinosaur comics archive and then tasting like Ryan for the next month (0.2667)
not having tiny brown birds live behind your air conditioner (0.2667)
popping the zits on your ass (0.2667)
loving your mama (0.2667)
eating food that fell on the ground (0.2667)
cleaning out your bowels through the act of pooping (0.2667)
mocha (0.2667)
buying one of each in EVERY COLOUR (0.2667)
The Princess Bride (0.2667)
that all you know about Final Fantasy, you learned from a friend who really liked it when you were teenagers (0.2667)
Peeing in someone's drink (0.2667)
crowdsurfing (0.2667)
being a dog person (0.2667)
taking the last brownie (0.2667)
slowly replacing every part of your body with machinery (0.2667)
spooning Jewel's boobs (0.2667)
pokemon (0.2673)
doing a favour that I knew would not be repayed (0.2674)
watching Borat (0.2681)
living drug free (0.2692)
listining to something when you know it'll make you cry (0.2692)
not memorising every Star Trek episode (0.2692)
that now that the Regret Index is back, you can go back to ignoring your Facebook, Twitter, Livejournal, Tegaki, and Deviantart (0.2692)
Wagner (0.2692)
white text on a dark background (0.2692)
eating a vegan (0.2692)
your First Time (0.2698)
private school (0.2703)
losing your virginity when you did (0.2703)
switching majors (0.2703)
a tiny woman (0.2703)
eating pistachio nuts (0.2708)
putting these dumb questions on here (0.2716)
ripping off penis jokes (0.2727)
boneless skinless chicken breasts (0.2727)
going to the fancy dress party as Batman, knowing full well that the theme had no conceivable connection to Batman (0.2727)
taking up the ukulele (0.2727)
making references to poetry (0.2727)
hide and seek (0.2727)
loving (0.2727)
halving a seventeen inch long penis (0.2727)
uisng pirate insults in a real fight (0.2727)
eating something you found on the ground or floor (0.2727)
being childfree (0.2727)
joining community theater (0.2727)
saying the name of the Scottish play (0.2727)
drinking from the tap (0.2727)
not eating my shorts (0.2727)
dating (0.2727)
loving Canada (0.2727)
banjo dueling (0.2727)
being the king of all cosmos (0.2727)
going wee wee wee all the way home (0.2727)
pushing it well (0.2727)
changing your name (0.2727)
OGC Man (0.2727)
floating in a most peculiar way (0.2727)
eating bacon made from pigs that had swine flu (0.2727)
tagging the Wikipedia article on irony as "contradicts itself" (0.2727)
Werther's Originals (0.2727)
not sleeping with that tranvestite (0.2727)
wondering where all these regretters came from (0.2727)
M C Escher (0.2727)
sighing (0.2727)
Taking an art degree (0.2727)
brutal legend (0.2727)
selling your nintendo wii (0.2727)
hasbro (0.2727)
a giant cup of hot chocolate, complete with little marshmellows and cream (0.2727)
waking up late in the afternoon (0.2727)
challenging someone to a duel via a glove to the face (0.2727)
going out to the woods today (0.2727)
making friends with a cat named Badger (0.2727)
opening a nice, refreshing Tab (0.2727)
theamazingregretindexing (0.2727)
sending emails using your friends emails when he or she leaves themselves logged in and are not looking (0.2745)
cooking yourself a lavish meal and not sharing it with anyone (0.2746)
eating that last cookie (0.2747)
having a winsome onesome (0.2750)
living with your mother (0.2750)
the venture brothers (0.2759)
that your livingroom is full of dancers (0.2759)
opening the windows (0.2759)
flames (0.2759)
fasting (0.2759)
coming on to the regret index (0.2759)
for some reason having a bias against nicotine (0.2759)
listening to a favorite song on repeat for hours (0.2759)
coming to this site (0.2763)
super fat hippos (0.2766)
having that threesome (0.2766)
using this site to admit your regrets (0.2766)
getting (0.2768)
asking them out (0.2770)
liking fat thighs you can not lie (0.2778)
eating boxed triceratops (0.2778)
looking at gross and fascinating things on Wikipedia (0.2778)
homographic homophonic autantonyms (0.2778)
being Ryan (0.2778)
wondering why rachel has returned to commenting without using her name (0.2778)
asking them to wait for you (0.2778)
your wares (0.2778)
wearing that outfit at the same time she did (0.2778)
walruses (0.2778)
not telling your parents (0.2788)
memorizing Monty Python and the Holy Grail (0.2791)
not knowing any ABBA songs by Heart (0.2791)
liking songs that seem innocent on first listening, but end up being about serial killers or something like that (0.2800)
being well envoweled (0.2800)
that someone keeps looking at my submitted regrets and combining them to form hilarious new ones (0.2800)
coming out (0.2800)
that you were only referring to the subjects of ABBA's music primarily seeming to come from a feminine point of view, but yeah, you don't mind referring to longhaired blonde Swedish dudes as "chicks" (0.2800)
going back in time to punch nazis in da face (0.2800)
being well endowed (0.2800)
not owning a single pair of tube socks (0.2800)
learning so many digits of pi (0.2800)
not having an abortion (0.2800)
spending the entire night going through the archives of that webcomic (0.2804)
wanting to discover life with someone (0.2813)
masturbating (0.2813)
zombies ate my neighbors (0.2813)
doing acid (0.2813)
boats (0.2813)
your gay experience (0.2817)
missing the Butthole Surfers concert (0.2821)
throwing your hands up in the air, waving them around like you just don't care (0.2821)
the successful launch of Sputnik I (0.2826)
eating too much at Thanksgiving (0.2836)
watching House (0.2847)
having your memories backed up on a thumb drive (0.2857)
following a dream even though it didn't work out (0.2857)
wanting to ride your bicycle, wanting to ride it when you like (0.2857)
the ventures (0.2857)
living in a country that doesn't have bagged milk (0.2857)
winter (0.2857)
your time machine (0.2857)
loving songs that have really depressing lyrics to go along with a happy beat (0.2857)
being born after Freddy Mercury died (0.2857)
only listening to good music (0.2857)
taking the Amtrak (0.2857)
never doing bad things (0.2857)
screaming I LOVE YOU from the top of your lungs (0.2857)
pooping on a dog (0.2857)
taking an expectorant (0.2857)
being honest (0.2857)
your double agency (0.2857)
having a detachable penis (0.2857)
coconut bras (0.2857)
ordering from Amazon marketplace (0.2857)
the death of a disco dancer (0.2857)
vowels (0.2857)
using drugs (0.2857)
fucking his mom (0.2857)
globalisation (0.2857)
eating snakes (0.2857)
throwing meat at vegans (0.2857)
tieing your best friend up (0.2857)
that your whole family is made of meat (0.2857)
your fingertips tasting like garlic (0.2857)
kissing him (0.2864)
deciding you are too cool to go to the prom (0.2867)
getting mushrooms on your pizza (0.2872)
telling the truth, even though it hurt him (0.2875)
secretly wanting internet fame (0.2877)
intentionally spreading Swine Flu (0.2879)
kissing that boy in Ithaca (0.2885)
rubbing my face in a tiger's belly (0.2889)
going POOP (0.2895)
playing Spyro (0.2895)
thinking that the dude in the header of this website is kinda cute (0.2895)
The Ten Second Rule (0.2917)
Philip Fry's eleventh year of living in the future (0.2917)
loving chocolate so damn much (0.2917)
going on to hotornot just to give everyone a really low score to stop them getting big headed (0.2917)
your circumcision (0.2917)
cathedrals (0.2917)
not sleeping with him (0.2917)
that Weezing is a member of both the Team Rocket Poison Type binary with Arbok, and the Cinnabar Mansion Pollution binary with Muk (0.2917)
gazing (0.2917)
flirting with somebody other than your significant other (0.2924)
tackling her (0.2927)
picking Charmander (0.2927)
sleeping with your best friend (0.2931)
taking the red pill (0.2933)
that fry is your favorite character on futurama (0.2941)
only wanting to see Wolverine because of the hot, hairy Liev Schreiber (0.2941)
adding a new regret (0.2941)
using only one pokemon (0.2941)
wondering how one gets a job as a taxidermist and bone cleaner (0.2941)
using ghee as an intimate lubricant (0.2941)
the flowers that bloom in the spring (0.2941)
every sexual experience you've ever had (0.2941)
your internet name lasting this long (0.2941)
rioting with the frenzied mob (0.2941)
peeing in the shower (0.2941)
not giving change to what you thought was a homeless guy but was just some dude in need of a shower (0.2941)
taking it all off (0.2941)
coming from the land of the ice and snow, from the midnight sun where the hot springs flow (0.2941)
driving all day in order to pick up your brother, who is coming home for the summer (0.2941)
accidentally setting my balls on fire with a barbecue lighter (0.2941)
being a child once (0.2941)
not voting for the President (0.2941)
going to a tiny college (0.2941)
giving that bum some money (0.2947)
waking up this morning (0.2954)
hanging out with strangers on public transit (0.2960)
eating some vittles (0.2963)
chewing on things (0.2963)
cutting off your long hair (0.2963)
geometry (0.2963)
wondering if anyone has the old regret list (0.2963)
forgetting sarah marshall (0.2963)
pressing that big button (0.2963)
not getting circumcised (0.2979)
laughing because you suddenly remembered something hilarious, then realizing strangers are looking at you (0.2984)
Batman (0.3000)
not thinking xkcd should get as much grief as it does (0.3000)
that there is no such thing as an original sin (0.3000)
can mine for fish (0.3000)
eating a child once (0.3000)
getting milk faced and humming like rabbits (0.3000)
stealing Tucksworth's hamburger (0.3000)
that everybody's footloose (0.3000)
decimating this pie (0.3000)
believing in god (0.3000)
sex with your best friend (0.3000)

most voted regrets

meeting Brian Peppers (12561/0.9789)
Kento (2760/0.9993)
turtles (2607/0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (2431/0.0004)
that you're suddenly very interested in the origin of the champagne out of a shoe trope (2336/0.5076)
[ show more ]

most discussed regrets

turtles (4882)
being a minimalist (4567)
tricking a straight guy into dating another straight guy (4418)
not having met ryan north (4257)
Kento (4240)
[ show more ]