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recent regrets

nanananananananana BAT PRICK
Currently, the phrase 'Bat Prick' is often used to describe any disparate group of young British ring rapists and secret cancers of Moonies
bottoming for Loo Brew in Hard Dark Wetback
Hard Dark Wetback performed extremely poorly during its limited run
Currently, the phrase 'Brit Pack' is often used to describe any disparate group of young British actors and actresses of rising prominence
fuck marry kill, the Rat Pack, the Brat Pack, the Frat Pack
wondering when we'll get a new Pack to succeed Packs Rat, Brat, and Frat, and what it will be called
Jane Witherspoon
The Dark Backward performed extremely poorly during its limited run
getting a raw blow from Rob Lowe
I did joke about giving better head as a result of WIZARDLY sexual abuse committed against me when I was a teen
I did joke about giving better head as a result of clerical sexual abuse committed against me when I was a teen
raw dogging Kento
Although Carroll accurately portrays the biological walrus's appetite for bivalve mollusks, oysters, primarily nearshore and intertidal inhabitants, in fact comprise an insignificant portion of its diet, even in captivity
The Hardest Walrus Pizzle Ever
The Hardest Logic Puzzle Ever
giving a walrus pansies on a date
giving a walrus show on a date
giving a donkey show on a date
making a snuff film on a date
[ show all 124182 regrets ]

recent comments

(3) fuck marry kill, the Rat Pack, the Brat Pack, the Frat Pack
(3) Currently, the phrase 'Brit Pack' is often used to describe any disparate group of young British actors and actresses of rising prominence
(1) getting a raw blow from Rob Lowe
(7) wondering who Tabitha on regret two zero six eight was and how she found the index
(2) hi kento
(3) being that chicken flavored ramen that make your sweat smell like chicken
(2) your new dildo being too big for you
(1) pitching an original sitcom in which Charles Martinet and Scott Baio play a prominently married couple who make a living playing traditional Mexican music, Mariochachi Band
(1) being followed on twitter by a guy named BLAZING HOMOSEX
(2) Kento "Dick Dick Dick" Ikeda
[ show more ]

search regrets

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top regrets

kind of loving Gene Hunt, that magnificent bastard (1.0000)
the goddamn deliberately disabled modems Earthlink sent out to customers in the early aughts, cannot enable DHCP without "paying" extra, and using PPoE plus a router with DHCP disables streaming video, FU Earthlink (1.0000)
shows that only have eight episodes per season (1.0000)
that I'm afraid the pretzels are no longer complimentary, Mr Bond (1.0000)
regrets about pony blowing (1.0000)
[ show more ]

bottom regrets

twats (0.0000)
telling the Philippines authorities that Kento is a drug mule (0.0000)
bellowing DARKNESS MY OLD FRIEND (0.0000)
having sex with a girl who looked a lot like Christina Ricci (0.0000)
arresting a king in his own palace (0.0000)
smashing a birdhouse with your flaccid dick (0.0000)
killing the California girls (0.0000)
telling that girl in second grade who insisted that you were "the boss of her" to show you her vagina (0.0000)
rubbing one out in the bathroom at church (0.0000)
not being Kento (0.0000)
humping Jewel's bust (0.0000)
sucking her left one until she had a breastgasm (0.0000)
licking Danish remoulade off of Chris Lydon's erect penis (0.0000)
slamming your dick in the car door (0.0000)
Owen and Mzee (0.0000)
banging a Tim Burton heroine (0.0000)
fisting Go Ikeda (0.0000)
using the word "waffletastic" (0.0000)
holding your boobs when you run down the stairs (0.0000)
cornholing Willie Mays (0.0000)
not eating out Kento (0.0000)
stabbing Isabella Rossellini and ejaculating in the wound (0.0000)
The Curious Cans of Benjamin Buttocks (0.0000)
brunettes (0.0000)
stealing that girl's bra from the communal laundry room (0.0000)
shaving Jewel's bush, meow (0.0000)
teabagging Raymond Burr (0.0000)
masturbating with your cut off hand (0.0000)
having impure thoughts about a teenage Kimmie Gibbler (0.0000)
tits (0.0000)
pussy (0.0000)
having Gordon Ramsay voice an orangutan who does nothing but masturbate and defecate (0.0000)
turtles (0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (0.0004)
breasts (0.0135)
regret index greatest tits, Kento (0.0153)
buying multiple copies of the book "To Be or Not to Be" by the incredibly handsome New York Times bestselling author Ryan North (0.0161)
slamming your dick in Jewel's boobs (0.0185)
saying no when you should have said yes (0.0217)
having a lesbian crush on Alex Dainis (0.0233)
dongs (0.0297)
staring at Bicoid Babe's ass seriously (0.0310)
Twin Long Rods #Two (0.0345)
asian racks (0.0357)
fisting Kevin Bacon at home (0.0370)
hating reality TV shows (0.0385)
sexy makeouts (0.0400)
going to the Sweatiest Ass in the World world premiere with Kento (0.0408)
being awesome (0.0410)
going slightly out of your way to step on that crunchy looking leaf (0.0433)
consistent pubic lice (0.0455)
dinosaurs (0.0466)
Receiving from Jaylala (0.0476)
breastfeeding (0.0526)
being the real deal (0.0526)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0541)
learning to play the xylophone (0.0543)
how weird The Regret Index becomes at night (0.0556)
Allison Iraheta being voted off American Idol (0.0556)
playing Dungeons & Dragons with Tim Duncan (0.0556)
being a nerd (0.0580)
drinking delicious lemonade and popping wheelies (0.0588)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0606)
boobs (0.0615)
making a fort in your living room out of couch cushions (0.0625)
building a castle out of the junk in a junkyard (0.0625)
demanding proof (0.0625)
managing to resist the perverse curiosity to see TwoGirlsOneCup, so far (0.0625)
this video (0.0667)
wondering what penguin would tase like (0.0714)
sleeping with that slim ugly huge breasted double D cup bucktoothed seventeen year old national merit scolar bikini model cellist goth, and by the way, screw you MB (0.0714)
having to wear glasses (0.0714)
really not regretting the number one four two eight at all (0.0714)
your love of eighties action movies (0.0727)
discovering webcomics (0.0769)
not wearing panties (0.0769)
defending the bullied kid (0.0769)
boobs, vaginas, asses, and such (0.0769)
getting FOUR fish hooks stuck in your scrotum (0.0769)
futurama (0.0769)
sprinking chocolate chips on your beloved's breasts as you knead them (0.0769)
playing it loud (0.0769)
that Jewel has huge boobs, seriously (0.0769)
choosing Squirtle (0.0769)
playing Dungeons & Dragons with Tim Duncan (0.0769)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0811)
that walruses, goats, and swans represent the Leviathan, Behemoth, and Ziz, respectively, of the regret index (0.0833)
"Allison Iraheta being voted off American Idol" being voted off the bottom regrets list (0.0833)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0833)
Bicoid Babe (0.0833)
having beautiful breasts (0.0833)
soliciting a fourteen year old boy to pose for sexually explicit photographs (0.0833)
disabling your crazy friend (0.0833)
cuddling (0.0833)
not supporting the President (0.0833)
dinosaur comics (0.0833)
that wikipedia describes attending concerts as a "ritual" (0.0833)
saying, "boners ahoy!" (0.0853)
staying in college (0.0879)
sharing warm spiced cider with a loved one (0.0891)
Squirtle (0.0909)
baking bread (0.0909)
Digimon (0.0909)
garlic (0.0909)
Bicoid Babe (0.0909)
nomming a hamburger (0.0909)
indulging your nerd side (0.0909)
NOT kneeling before Zod (0.0909)
suckling (0.0909)
hugging a tree like a dirty hippie (0.0909)
questioning your sexuality (0.0909)
making waffles (0.0918)
kicking it old school (0.0926)
moving out of your parent's house (0.0941)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0952)
treehouses (0.0952)
fun times involving sushi (0.0959)
learning another language (0.0962)
not having seen Muriel's Wedding (0.0968)
publicly mocking Swine Flu (0.0970)
dromiceiomimus (0.0976)
drinking delicious lemonade (0.0982)
rocking out (0.0988)
butts (0.0991)
less than three (0.1000)
sitting on the floor in second grade (0.1000)
growing up in a nonchurchgoing family (0.1000)
spooning Kento's boobs (0.1000)
buying a Dinosaur Comics tshirt (0.1017)
sleeping naked (0.1026)
playing videogames while drunk (0.1048)
defending cream soda (0.1062)
putting punctuation in your comment (0.1067)
the last time you drank (0.1071)
the very last thing you said (0.1071)
opening new cider (0.1077)
spending all weekend naked (0.1111)
going to lunch (0.1111)
following that white rabbit (0.1111)
that stuff getting eaten is inherently funny (0.1111)
the death of Margaret Hilda Thatcher (0.1111)
hugging a tree like a koala (0.1111)
kissing (0.1116)
becoming an atheist (0.1124)
getting into firefly (0.1126)
saying 'boners ahoy' (0.1127)
World War Two's ending in Allied victory (0.1129)
party party partying hard (0.1136)
being meat (0.1143)
starting over (0.1143)
eating raised bread (0.1154)
closing the door (0.1154)
boners (0.1156)
friendship (0.1167)
downloading music illegally (0.1176)
making a little space for the cheese slices (0.1176)
spending an evening eating spicy cheetos, reading language log, and masturbating to nude photos of your ex from five years ago (0.1176)
the little wiggly things at the end of feet (0.1176)
that rachel is back (0.1176)
drinking your first drink (0.1183)
getting your hot cocoa on (0.1200)
skipping work to sit in the sun (0.1200)
accepting candy from strangers (0.1204)
thinking of rain (0.1212)
the color of blood outside the body when one has iron based blood (0.1212)
ryan north (0.1226)
drinking a cold beer in the shower (0.1228)
Voting for Barak Obama (0.1228)
breathing (0.1239)
hating family guy almost as soon as it was uncanceled (0.1250)
not meeting Emily Gray (0.1250)
reading the book that changed everything (0.1250)
smoking weed (0.1266)
popping wheelies with the boys (0.1275)
winning (0.1287)
watching Mystery Science Theatre all night (0.1304)
having sex at seventeen (0.1304)
that groove is in the heart (0.1304)
Getting into Miles Davis (0.1304)
vandalizing Wikipedia's chicken page that one time (0.1304)
talking to strangers (0.1311)
not getting the chance to meet the Mets (0.1311)
free speech (0.1316)
voting (0.1324)
Zooey Deschanel looks like a sandblasted Lucy Lawless (0.1333)
eating goat cheese (0.1333)
not installing Safari Three on all your computers yet (0.1333)
flushing that gallon of rotten shrimp down the toilet (0.1333)
attempting to lucid dream (0.1333)
obama (0.1348)
qwantz (0.1356)
making mud soup as a kid (0.1364)
kissing her (0.1364)
making out with that girl dressed as a French maid at that costume party (0.1364)
holding hands (0.1364)
being one of the very few people in your circle of friends to never really have the urge to smoke cigarettes (0.1389)
lasers (0.1395)
singing along (0.1395)
not wringing your parent's neck (0.1400)
not having kids (0.1408)
skipping the Harry Potter midnight release (0.1413)
ap classes (0.1413)
taking AP classes (0.1417)
paying for a whole seat but only using the edge (0.1429)
What is this I don't even (0.1429)
polydactyl cats (0.1429)
going hog wild (0.1429)
kicking everyone's butt (0.1429)
eating roast beef off of your own boobs (0.1429)
being a rocker (0.1429)
having erotic fantasies about Bob Dylan (0.1429)
losing your virginity (0.1429)
having impure thoughts about a teenage Winona Rider (0.1429)
that for every n in N there is a finite sequence a subscript k, of which every member is in Z and is nonnegative, such that the product for i from one to m, where m is the length of the sequence, of p subscript i to the power of a subscript i equals n (0.1429)
in jokes (0.1429)
sexy spaceships (0.1429)
I don't know, always kind of liking narwhals yourself (0.1429)
making out with that girl who turned out to still be in high school (0.1429)
not boning a donkey (0.1429)
not going to freecreditreport dot com (0.1429)
dropping your first truth and beauty bomb (0.1429)
liking michael showalter a lot (0.1429)
putting your jeans and socks in one load (0.1429)
growing long hair (0.1453)
living abroad (0.1477)
all those books you read (0.1481)
not being pretentious enough (0.1481)
passing yourself off as royalty (0.1500)
eating vaguely european (0.1500)
spending an entire weekend in your pjs (0.1500)
blowing raspberries (0.1500)
accepting a lower paying but much less stressfull job (0.1505)
burning that motherfucker down (0.1515)
breaking the law (0.1522)
going to the gym (0.1524)
sneaking around in a cardboard box, Metal Gear style (0.1538)
keeping on trucking (0.1538)
pie (0.1538)
physically assaulting that guy who can't even bother to tune in the easy listening station properly in his cubicle (0.1538)
The Middleman being cancelled (0.1538)
drinking champagne out of a chimp anus (0.1538)
deep throating Stephen Fry (0.1538)
that you always liked Mike more than Joel (0.1538)
that "bottom regrets" and "most voted regrets" are white while "add a new regret" "search regrets" "recent regrets" "top regrets" and "recent comments" are all in blue (0.1538)
wearing two socks (0.1538)
Being born (0.1543)
trying that exotic food (0.1544)
not kissing up to people, even if it's in your best interest to do so (0.1556)
memorising every Star Trek episode (0.1557)
keeping it real (0.1557)
loving Batman (0.1579)
getting drunk at a wedding (0.1579)
having seen Star Wars all the through probably over a hundred times (0.1579)
that "avril lavigne" in Canadia is a line of spring fresh canuck bidets (0.1579)
learning an instrument (0.1587)
gay (0.1587)
having a power level of over NINE THOUSAND (0.1591)
that you tend to give money to buskers or not depending on their talent (0.1600)
eating in a rad mood (0.1600)
reading the regret index (0.1613)
eating bread (0.1622)
wikipedia (0.1622)
the indescribable beauty of simplicity (0.1622)
eating meat (0.1628)
playing Starfox Sixty Four (0.1647)
how many times you went back over the archive for Dinosaur comics (0.1648)
Pretending to be asleep to avoid talking (0.1649)
visiting this website (0.1656)
being in a rad mood (0.1667)
sweetness (0.1667)
eating her out (0.1667)
refusing to accept the modern sense of "tweet" into your vocabulary (0.1667)
clockwork (0.1667)
christmas (0.1667)
just wanting a sign (0.1667)
always eating your skittles in prismatic order (0.1667)
busting myths (0.1667)
cheese (0.1667)
being the one kid in your nerd clique who instantly hated Return of the Jedi with a passion (0.1667)
eating left handed (0.1667)
pudding (0.1667)
watching 'The Dark Knight' (0.1667)
wondering if so many ladies turn to writing and reading smut because they crave porn but get turned off by the way it's made (0.1667)
having roast beef (0.1667)
randomly meeting people who fill your heart with glee (0.1667)
being able to say 'when I was your age, pluto was a planet' (0.1695)
playing in traffic (0.1696)
being British (0.1698)
not switching to Geico (0.1712)
having eaten dinner (0.1714)
having a onesome (0.1717)
hugging a tree (0.1719)
dancing naked ALL DAY LONG (0.1739)
neing a super freak super freak (0.1739)
wondering whether Kento, Document, Sarah, and Pseudonym have found the new regret index yet (0.1739)
listening to Wagner (0.1739)
not waxing your eyebrows in high school (0.1748)
that where we're going we don't need roads (0.1748)
preparing for the zombie apocalypse (0.1750)
a log cabin (0.1757)
staying up all night to watch the sun rise (0.1757)
thinking of lettuce as just a delivery system for salad dressing (0.1765)
getting a lick job from a trannie hooker in the dumpster behind Steak n Shake (0.1765)
planning for the zombie attack (0.1765)
not being one of those women who instantly fawn over babies (0.1765)
putting on your robe and wizard hat (0.1765)
dessert (0.1765)
Garfield Minus Garfield (0.1765)
eating a huge nerd (0.1765)
loving lamp (0.1771)
having a crush on the Utahraptor (0.1773)
peanut butter (0.1778)
that Venn diagramming is your favorite type of diagramming (0.1786)
sexing her hardcore (0.1786)
breaking bones while snowboarding (0.1786)
painting the bedroom a color other than white or offwhite (0.1789)
insisting on protection (0.1795)
not smoking (0.1795)
that the Index is back, and the old users are back, and it is amazing nostalgic times for all (0.1795)
bacon (0.1795)
still knowing the lyrics to eighties pop songs (0.1795)
not eating goats for a living (0.1818)
dancing naked (0.1818)
simple english wikipedia (0.1818)
using the word "substitute" as a substitute for "replacement" (0.1818)
that you wonder if rachel would be in your klan or hoard or guild or whatever when the pokemon mmorpg comes out (0.1818)
ever reading books (0.1818)
road trips (0.1818)
hot bondage (0.1818)
trying to convince someone you are their Tyler Durden (0.1818)
lovin' dem pizza rolls (0.1818)
not really liking MMORPGs (0.1818)
spending the Fourth in someone else's country (0.1818)
bringing up your distaste for Disney music (0.1818)
that, in a way, David Carradine's death from autoerotic asphyxiation could properly be termed "a fatal stroke" (0.1818)
camping (0.1818)
lullabies (0.1818)
streaking (0.1818)
pronouncing "Intelligentsia" with a hard G (0.1818)
eating a huge marshmallow (0.1818)
recognizing the beauty of mathematics and logic (0.1818)
brownies (0.1818)
wondering whether a centaur foal would suckle from the human breasts or the horse teats underneath (0.1818)
buying food for homeless people (0.1825)
telling your parents you're an atheist (0.1833)
not living in Corvallis, Oregon (0.1835)
yelling "in bed" at the end of fortune cookie fortunes (0.1837)
washing your pet (0.1837)
fry (0.1842)
drawing penises on the worksheet (0.1842)
hot snogging (0.1842)
listening to Beethoven (0.1852)
standing the test of time (0.1852)
going to college (0.1852)
having a huge internet crush on Kate Beaton (0.1852)
being an alligator (0.1852)
having a huge weiner (0.1852)
not knowing every ABBA song by heart, yet (0.1860)
donating to public radio (0.1860)
feeling that Pepe is the cutes BYOB corner pet (0.1875)
foreplay (0.1875)
wanting to be under the sea, in an octopus's garden, in the shade (0.1875)
wearing white after Labor Day (0.1875)
chocolate spread (0.1875)
being real and fantastic (0.1875)
not joining the military (0.1875)
watching Captain Planet (0.1875)
iTunes somehow playing the same song around the same time every day despite being on shuffle (0.1875)
living in the city (0.1875)
not knowing more about Anonymous (0.1875)
eating a butterfinger (0.1875)
using the word "retarded" as a replacement for "stupid" (0.1875)
the metric system (0.1878)
giving that dorky, but really sweet guy a chance (0.1885)
dowloading that song (0.1887)
not actually being bitter or a nihilist (0.1905)
eating a noun (0.1905)
being a meatatarian (0.1905)
taking boat (0.1905)
waiting most of the morning for the time to roll around when you can go to lunch at the most awesome hot dog place ever (0.1905)
being the cat's meow (0.1905)
having a name that is fifty percent vowels (0.1905)
that the sea is deep and full of mystery (0.1905)
shooting Scott Temple (0.1905)
choosing cake instead of death (0.1905)
hooking up words and phrases and clauses (0.1905)
this picture (0.1923)
not watching the movie Pontypool (0.1923)
being afraid of Americans (0.1923)
telling your mother you don't want to have children (0.1923)
bondage (0.1923)
milk (0.1935)
earning a PhD instead of an MD (0.1935)
chrono trigger (0.1935)
holding cats (0.1935)
learning new and interesting things about skin and blood (0.1935)
drawing a webcomic (0.1947)
saving up some money (0.1951)
not seeing Nicolas Cage after seeing Face Off (0.1951)
reading pictures for sad children (0.1951)
choosing adventure over security (0.1964)
signing up for Twitter (0.1983)
jerking off into your roommate's shampoo bottle, not just once but every day for like two weeks (0.2000)
masturbating at a Jessica Alba movie (0.2000)
that larder is a pretty neat, word, a holdover whose anachronistic meaning specifically meant a COLD storage room, but post refrigeration came to mean simply a pantry, but it could also mean a supply of food, the thing itself (0.2000)
busting through the heavens with your drill (0.2000)
making pies (0.2000)
getting over your ex so quickly (0.2000)
delicious ice cream (0.2000)
dandelion wine (0.2000)
a glorious fart (0.2000)
not having played Kingdom Hearts yet (0.2000)
being the hottest item on the regret index (0.2000)
hooking up with ryan (0.2000)
losing your religion (0.2000)
British English (0.2000)
revealing your nerdiness (0.2000)
going on a bicycle tour (0.2000)
buying the newer model (0.2000)
that crazy night in Pheonix (0.2000)
finally taking a chance and talking to him or her (0.2000)
how awesome broiling is (0.2000)
ghosts (0.2000)
someday wanting to own land, with fruit growing on that land (0.2000)
jumping in that lake (0.2022)
buying a Mac (0.2027)
not going to dartmouth (0.2034)
making love to your hand (0.2035)
extra sprinkles (0.2037)
Fictional Jimbo Wales (0.2041)
being bigger on the inside (0.2045)
listening to the whole CD (0.2051)
giving a gift as a surprise (0.2055)
finding the key to the secret garden (0.2059)
mARRIAGE (0.2059)
liking folk rock (0.2059)
swallowing (0.2069)
the Lord of the Rings (0.2079)
being mean to the neighbor's rude kid (0.2083)
spending two hours on the phone with your grandmother (0.2083)
ever reading that first comic strip on the Web (0.2083)
changing your cell phone number (0.2083)
the resurrection of the regret index (0.2083)
singing Bohemian Rhapsody at the top of your lungs (0.2083)
experimenting with new and interesting sandwich fillings (0.2086)
thanksgiving (0.2086)
not going to prom (0.2088)
magic (0.2105)
eating cows (0.2105)
pancakes (0.2105)
being Witty (0.2105)
wearing a tshirt with a dinosaur on it to a dinosaur museum (0.2105)
sleeping for thirteen hours (0.2105)
the Dromiceiomimus' improbable colouring (0.2105)
xkcd (0.2105)
wanting to take a girl under your arm (0.2105)
turning it up to eleven (0.2105)
dinosaur wrestling (0.2105)
Dinosaur Comics' new layout (0.2105)
staying up all night to watch an eighteen year old paint her nails online (0.2115)
watching the Donald Duck cartoon "Die Fuhrer's Face" (0.2121)
donating (0.2121)
playing chess (0.2121)
buying a motorcycle (0.2121)
feeling closer to people in this world of regret (0.2121)
post it notes (0.2128)
switching parties (0.2128)
what you did last Friday night (0.2135)
listening to music at a much higher or lower volume than what the artist intended (0.2143)
listening to music that no one else has heard of (0.2143)
chocolate (0.2143)
eating pizza (0.2143)
wondering if we can get back up to forty thousand regrets in a year's time (0.2143)
disagreeing with things (0.2143)
lying on a futon (0.2143)
wondering, if the death machine was made of organic technology, could it predict its own death (0.2143)
facial hair (0.2143)
being really cool (0.2143)
using words that are not really words (0.2143)
making your time (0.2143)
going to market (0.2143)
the invention of custard (0.2143)
going to university (0.2143)
air guitar (0.2143)
being the lazer viking (0.2143)
Monty Python (0.2143)
that consomme is broth with will (0.2143)
not killing every faggot I've ever seen in my entire life (0.2143)
Jack Kerouac (0.2143)
running with scissors (0.2151)
using hugs, not drugs (0.2157)
going to the beach alone (0.2157)
being American (0.2160)
knowing why the caged bird sings (0.2162)
taking care of knives (0.2174)
this place smelling like brownies all of the sudden (0.2174)
telling your brother he was adopted (0.2174)
eating a tasty salad (0.2174)
ephemera (0.2174)
punching that baby, despite it's rude behavior (0.2174)
giggling over a heart's warm cockles (0.2174)
not eating Pizza Hut pizza (0.2174)
watching the sunrise (0.2174)
purposely deceiving someone who never listens to what you have to say (0.2182)
pretending you're a woman to get into nursing school (0.2188)
the death of Clippy (0.2200)
missing the NBA playoffs to watch the new episode of 'Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmern' (0.2203)
almost always using the British spellings for things, even though you are an American and your spell check always tells you it's wrong (0.2206)
shooting a man in Reno just to watch him die (0.2211)
being too awesome (0.2222)
being the bee's knees (0.2222)
looking at pictures of adorable puppies (0.2222)
PIN numbers (0.2222)
pictures for sad children (0.2222)
wondering what the significance of the qwantz dot com domain name is (0.2222)
good times (0.2222)
playing dress up (0.2222)
major tom (0.2222)
feeding the ducks (0.2222)
fighting the Nausican (0.2222)
painting your fingernails lime green (0.2222)
raspberries, om nom nom (0.2222)
sending the President into exile (0.2222)
explaining to someone what the Regret Index is (0.2222)
Loosing you religion or faith (0.2222)
being Anonymous (0.2222)
volunteering (0.2222)
tiger's belly (0.2222)
getting a tattoo (0.2222)
crying during the first ten minutes of the new Star Trek movie (0.2241)
stealing the enterprise (0.2241)
dancing all crazy (0.2250)
xylophones (0.2250)
EXISTING (0.2254)
escaping out the back (0.2258)
spreading your legs (0.2258)
ATM machines (0.2273)
cut and pasting a webcomic (0.2273)
staying on the phone all night (0.2273)
takin it to the streets (0.2273)
quitting even though the job was OK, but just OK (0.2273)
cooking bacon (0.2273)
writing slashfiction about webcomic authors (0.2286)
a lifetime dedicated to public displays of air guitar (0.2286)
what happened in vegas (0.2286)
wondering if there's a way to extract all of these autofill regrets into a text file for saving and possibly choosing the better ones (0.2286)
not settling down when all your friends did (0.2286)
optical illusions (0.2292)
sticking with your major (0.2292)
the internet (0.2293)
extra cheese (0.2308)
that dreaming is free (0.2308)
eating cheese just for the sake of eating cheese (0.2308)
playing god (0.2308)
reading every single Dinosaur Comic from beginning to end in a single sitting (0.2308)
reproducing via meiosis (0.2308)
stories about elves and unicorns (0.2308)
filling your thesis with references to monkeys (0.2308)
that you like pie quite a bit (0.2308)
a French guy who looks like Janice Dickinson wearing a strap on under a fancy ball gown, just to piss off his rich bitch girlfriend and her annoying family (0.2308)
having a cute little white butt (0.2308)
having an affair with the flirty executive assistant (0.2308)
correcting your friends everytime they misspell Dromiceiomimus (0.2308)
having an adolescent crush on Christopher Walken (0.2308)
the general awesomeness of blacklights (0.2308)
actually finding pigeons more cute than vermin like (0.2308)
not having a penis (0.2308)
flipping off everyone you hated from high school (0.2308)
not knowing who Richard Dawkins is (0.2308)
going to Spain (0.2308)
being your mother's child (0.2308)
horseshoe crabs (0.2308)
puttin' on the ritz (0.2308)
birth control (0.2308)
leaving a legacy (0.2308)
being a pantyaire, like a millionaire but with panties instead of money (0.2308)
vaguely effeminate dancing frogs (0.2308)
running away from indie cred, even though you listen to some of the music (0.2308)
preferring women with body hair over women who shave (0.2308)
deep fat frying a twinkie (0.2308)
buying a chocolate bar without checking the label first, only to find it had peanuts in it (0.2320)
spending a whole bunch of time reading random articles on wikipedia (0.2326)
that your delicious cheeseburger was made from a cow whose cause of death was predicted by an infallible machine (0.2326)
chewing bubblegum (0.2326)
learning all the elements in the periodic table in order (0.2328)
getting a credit card (0.2329)
your haircut (0.2333)
getting out of bed this morning (0.2333)
Grad school (0.2336)
log cabin (0.2340)
spending an entire day listening to the same song on repeat (0.2348)
thinking that dinosaur might be good to eat, depending on the species, but wondering if the size of the animal would effect the texture of the meat or something like that (0.2353)
eating babies (0.2353)
deep frying boring healthy food (0.2353)
writing the letter "x" backwards and upsidedown (0.2353)
retiring early (0.2353)
going to church (0.2353)
tapping her mana (0.2353)
paying for something with fifteen dollars in quarters (0.2353)
anonymity (0.2353)
comitting massive regret vote fraud (0.2353)
tricking a straight guy into dating another straight guy (0.2353)
eating food that are high in potastium (0.2353)
dancing with the devil in the pale moon light (0.2353)
growing a handlebar moustache (0.2353)
wearing hipster glasses (0.2360)
becoming vegetarian or vegan (0.2364)
irony (0.2368)
only that you have but one life to give for your country (0.2373)
getting hooked on Harry Potter or Twilight (0.2375)
reading, that shit is crazy (0.2381)
making fun of people who instigate fights in YouTube's comments section (0.2381)
studying linguistics (0.2381)
adding this to StumbleUpon (0.2381)
buying a Wii (0.2381)
ice cream (0.2381)
being the latest in nerd technology (0.2381)
shit son, I don't know (0.2381)
doing it for the lulz (0.2386)
Skipping the Fiance's family Easter Dinner to play xbox and go to a concert (0.2389)
missing Efterklang at the Dublin Docklands (0.2400)
following Stephen Fry on Twitter (0.2400)
falling in love (0.2400)
helvetica (0.2400)
Paris (0.2400)
impersonating that person (0.2400)
going to an Ivy League school (0.2400)
broken broccoli (0.2400)
inventing a maneuver (0.2400)
losing your religion, like in that one song (0.2400)
airing out your nughty bits (0.2400)
orthodontics (0.2407)
penis (0.2407)
using flesh for digestive energy (0.2411)
still knowing the lyrics to nineties pop songs (0.2414)
not being on fire (0.2418)
my high GPA in high school (0.2418)
nothing (0.2421)
going through a Bob Marley phase in college, like EVERYONE else (0.2424)
love (0.2424)
tweed jackets with leather elbow patches (0.2429)
asking her out (0.2435)
the english alphabet (0.2436)
turning up at Ryan's door covered in mustard (0.2449)
giving up eating mammals (0.2460)
rereading all the harry potter books (0.2462)
dating someone much younger (0.2474)
breaking up with my first love (0.2482)
speaking in spoonerisms (0.2500)
being born during the hot war (0.2500)
sexual congress (0.2500)
that English is your fourth language and you speak it better than your first but not your second (0.2500)
that you never had a chance to tell Farty McCrablice that YOU LOVE HIM (0.2500)
thinking someone was hot just because they were good at maths (0.2500)
girls with full lips and wide hips (0.2500)
licking out a feminist (0.2500)
ever saying "no fat chicks" (0.2500)
the existence of the interrobang! (0.2500)
meeting a possum (0.2500)
not giving David Gwilliam kisses before he got married (0.2500)
line dancing while drunk (0.2500)
wondering what goes through their little kitty brains (0.2500)
being crazy and or retarded (0.2500)
deliberately misunderstanding offensive slang by taking it literally, ie assume when someone says 'faggot' that they refer to a bundle of sticks or twigs (0.2500)
getting a liberal arts education (0.2500)
lesbians (0.2500)
being a huge nerd (0.2500)
ira glass vs philip glass in "glass warfare" (0.2500)
books (0.2500)
not having balls (0.2500)
English (0.2500)
having low pop culture IQ (0.2500)
the first time you got drunk (0.2500)
smoking pot (0.2500)
answering the telephone in a foreign language (0.2500)
your very existence (0.2500)
a clandestine meating (0.2500)
life being so tasty (0.2500)
using my mom's deodorant (0.2500)
the simpsons (0.2500)
hugging a koala (0.2500)
being The One (0.2500)
never dealing drugs (0.2500)
making fun of fat swans (0.2500)
considering eating two dollars and fifty cents worth of raspberries in one sitting (0.2500)
underboob (0.2500)
having sex with your boss' underage daughter (0.2500)
tickling her THERE (0.2500)
being necessarily clever (0.2500)
trolling the UK government petition site with stupid petitions you know would be rejected (0.2500)
having sexy intestines (0.2500)
eating a minimalist (0.2500)
being scared of Kefka (0.2500)
the Pythagorean theorem (0.2500)
Ryan getting the Regret Index back up (0.2500)
that aloe plants are awesome (0.2500)
fluffy cats (0.2500)
knowing she was gay and still dating her (0.2500)
going the extra mile (0.2500)
your sudden urge to make brownies (0.2500)
all of the weird things you are a fan of (0.2500)
falling in love with the majesty of colors (0.2500)
a b a a b a b b b a b a a a a b b a b a b a a b b a a b b b a a b b a b b b a b b a b a a a b b b b b a a b b b a a a b a b a b a b a b b a b a a b b a b b a a a a b a b a b a a b b a b b a b a b b b a a b b a a b b a b b a b b b a a a b a b a b a b b a a (0.2500)
that Japanese people LOVE coelacanths (0.2500)
wondering what kind of girl would be impressed with somebody smoking, it doesn't seem that difficult to do (0.2500)
losing yourself and dreaming of world that lie between her fingers (0.2500)
girls, ewwwwww (0.2500)
yogurt's laxative properties (0.2500)
getting divorced (0.2500)
correcting people on their improper use of the subjunctive (0.2500)
socializing instead of playing video games (0.2527)
eating mexican food (0.2540)
dyeing your hair (0.2545)
trying something new (0.2547)
not googling The Underfold (0.2554)
chromatic scales (0.2558)
being (0.2558)
leaving the farm (0.2564)
wishing you could give yourself a blowie (0.2564)
not listening to Billy Zane (0.2564)
tang (0.2564)
not trying alcohol sooner (0.2564)
sexy times with a friend (0.2570)
being a socialist (0.2571)
not knowing what the big deal with Twitter is (0.2571)
referring to water as hydrogen hydroxide, as a means to both achieve maximal accuracy from the perspective of how the atoms are actually connected, and freaking people out (0.2581)
quoting that xkcd comic (0.2581)
going back for seconds on dessert (0.2582)
being a Shakespeare nerd (0.2593)
eating lunch yesterday (0.2593)
painting your fingernails black (0.2593)
eating tofu (0.2595)
the final countdown (0.2600)
eating all the royalty (0.2609)
tapirs (0.2609)
eating that piece of chocolate (0.2609)
eating out a feminist (0.2609)
bursting out into evil laughter in a crowded or public place (0.2609)
throwing your underwear onto the stage (0.2609)
making love above the pub (0.2609)
going to graduate school (0.2614)
starting that fire (0.2619)
learning lisp (0.2619)
having known love (0.2619)
eating that cookie out of the trash (0.2632)
cooking hamburgers on my engine block (0.2632)
being there for her when she needed you (0.2632)
being vaguely european (0.2632)
going commando (0.2632)
living on the edge (0.2632)
your twisted desires (0.2632)
everything (0.2632)
wondering what kind of feelings different animals feel (0.2632)
polygamy (0.2632)
taking comfort in the regret index in any way whatsoever (0.2632)
sexuality (0.2632)
writing a novel (0.2632)
being winsome (0.2632)
wanting gummi bears and or banana chips right now (0.2632)
giving your best when you know it won't be enough (0.2632)
that shorts are comfy and easy to wear (0.2647)
insisting on precision (0.2656)
responding with Sassy Molassy (0.2658)
eating food that fell on the ground (0.2667)
The Princess Bride (0.2667)
ordering from Amazon marketplace (0.2667)
Dresden Codak (0.2667)
slowly replacing every part of your body with machinery (0.2667)
that all you know about Final Fantasy, you learned from a friend who really liked it when you were teenagers (0.2667)
letting her sit in the front seat (0.2667)
alligators in the sewer (0.2667)
being a dog person (0.2667)
unpacking my adjectives (0.2667)
spooning Jewel's boobs (0.2667)
cleaning out your bowels through the act of pooping (0.2667)
buying one of each in EVERY COLOUR (0.2667)
Peeing in someone's drink (0.2667)
not having tiny brown birds live behind your air conditioner (0.2667)
taking the last brownie (0.2667)
mocha (0.2667)
crowdsurfing (0.2667)
popping the zits on your ass (0.2667)
pokemon (0.2673)
doing a favour that I knew would not be repayed (0.2674)
eating a vegan (0.2692)
not memorising every Star Trek episode (0.2692)
white text on a dark background (0.2692)
that now that the Regret Index is back, you can go back to ignoring your Facebook, Twitter, Livejournal, Tegaki, and Deviantart (0.2692)
listining to something when you know it'll make you cry (0.2692)
Wagner (0.2692)
your First Time (0.2698)
losing your virginity when you did (0.2703)
switching majors (0.2703)
private school (0.2703)
a tiny woman (0.2703)
eating pistachio nuts (0.2708)
putting these dumb questions on here (0.2716)
changing your name (0.2727)
ripping off penis jokes (0.2727)
wondering where all these regretters came from (0.2727)
eating something you found on the ground or floor (0.2727)
being the king of all cosmos (0.2727)
boneless skinless chicken breasts (0.2727)
gyrating your leatherwrapped genitals in the faces of those Japanese schoolchildren (0.2727)
a giant cup of hot chocolate, complete with little marshmellows and cream (0.2727)
joining community theater (0.2727)
brutal legend (0.2727)
making references to poetry (0.2727)
being childfree (0.2727)
dating (0.2727)
loving Canada (0.2727)
eating bacon made from pigs that had swine flu (0.2727)
going to the fancy dress party as Batman, knowing full well that the theme had no conceivable connection to Batman (0.2727)
not eating my shorts (0.2727)
selling your nintendo wii (0.2727)
waking up late in the afternoon (0.2727)
not sleeping with that tranvestite (0.2727)
drinking from the tap (0.2727)
banjo dueling (0.2727)
going out to the woods today (0.2727)
taking up the ukulele (0.2727)
OGC Man (0.2727)
floating in a most peculiar way (0.2727)
opening a nice, refreshing Tab (0.2727)
loving (0.2727)
hide and seek (0.2727)
hasbro (0.2727)
challenging someone to a duel via a glove to the face (0.2727)
making friends with a cat named Badger (0.2727)
tagging the Wikipedia article on irony as "contradicts itself" (0.2727)
Werther's Originals (0.2727)
halving a seventeen inch long penis (0.2727)
theamazingregretindexing (0.2727)
Taking an art degree (0.2727)
pushing it well (0.2727)
going wee wee wee all the way home (0.2727)
M C Escher (0.2727)
watching Borat (0.2734)
sending emails using your friends emails when he or she leaves themselves logged in and are not looking (0.2745)
having a winsome onesome (0.2750)
living with your mother (0.2750)
the venture brothers (0.2759)
fasting (0.2759)
flames (0.2759)
eating macademia nuts (0.2759)
for some reason having a bias against nicotine (0.2759)
opening the windows (0.2759)
coming on to the regret index (0.2759)
listening to a favorite song on repeat for hours (0.2759)
that your livingroom is full of dancers (0.2759)
coming to this site (0.2763)
super fat hippos (0.2766)
having that threesome (0.2766)
using this site to admit your regrets (0.2766)
getting (0.2768)
asking them out (0.2770)
being Ryan (0.2778)
eating boxed triceratops (0.2778)
eating that last cookie (0.2778)
liking fat thighs you can not lie (0.2778)
wondering why rachel has returned to commenting without using her name (0.2778)
wearing that outfit at the same time she did (0.2778)
walruses (0.2778)
asking them to wait for you (0.2778)
your wares (0.2778)
the moon (0.2778)
not knowing any ABBA songs by Heart (0.2791)
memorizing Monty Python and the Holy Grail (0.2791)
reading through the entire dinosaur comics archive and then talking like Ryan for the next month (0.2791)
cooking yourself a lavish meal and not sharing it with anyone (0.2797)
coming out (0.2800)
liking songs that seem innocent on first listening, but end up being about serial killers or something like that (0.2800)
going back in time to punch nazis in da face (0.2800)
that you were only referring to the subjects of ABBA's music primarily seeming to come from a feminine point of view, but yeah, you don't mind referring to longhaired blonde Swedish dudes as "chicks" (0.2800)
not owning a single pair of tube socks (0.2800)
taking the boat (0.2800)
not having an abortion (0.2800)
that someone keeps looking at my submitted regrets and combining them to form hilarious new ones (0.2800)
being well envoweled (0.2800)
being well endowed (0.2800)
spending the entire night going through the archives of that webcomic (0.2804)
zombies ate my neighbors (0.2813)
wanting to discover life with someone (0.2813)
telling him you had feelings for him even though you really didn't know whether he'd reciprocate (0.2813)
doing acid (0.2813)
masturbating (0.2813)
puppy dawgs (0.2813)
boats (0.2813)
your gay experience (0.2817)
missing the Butthole Surfers concert (0.2821)
throwing your hands up in the air, waving them around like you just don't care (0.2821)
selling myself to science (0.2821)
the successful launch of Sputnik I (0.2826)
eating too much at Thanksgiving (0.2836)
tieing your best friend up (0.2857)
the ventures (0.2857)
taking the Amtrak (0.2857)
using drugs (0.2857)
globalisation (0.2857)
vowels (0.2857)
following a dream even though it didn't work out (0.2857)
coconut bras (0.2857)
throwing meat at vegans (0.2857)
that your whole family is made of meat (0.2857)
pooping on a dog (0.2857)
only listening to good music (0.2857)
never doing bad things (0.2857)
being honest (0.2857)
winter (0.2857)
having a detachable penis (0.2857)
the death of a disco dancer (0.2857)
lying about how spicy it was (0.2857)
wanting to ride your bicycle, wanting to ride it when you like (0.2857)
taking an expectorant (0.2857)
being born after Freddy Mercury died (0.2857)
not telling your parents (0.2857)
living in a country that doesn't have bagged milk (0.2857)
eating snakes (0.2857)
fucking his mom (0.2857)
screaming I LOVE YOU from the top of your lungs (0.2857)
loving songs that have really depressing lyrics to go along with a happy beat (0.2857)
your double agency (0.2857)
your fingertips tasting like garlic (0.2857)
having your memories backed up on a thumb drive (0.2857)
kissing him (0.2864)
deciding you are too cool to go to the prom (0.2867)
getting mushrooms on your pizza (0.2872)
telling the truth, even though it hurt him (0.2875)
secretly wanting internet fame (0.2877)
intentionally spreading Swine Flu (0.2879)
kissing that boy in Ithaca (0.2885)
rubbing my face in a tiger's belly (0.2889)
thinking that the dude in the header of this website is kinda cute (0.2895)
learning so many digits of pi (0.2895)
playing Spyro (0.2895)
going POOP (0.2895)
watching House (0.2897)
cathedrals (0.2917)
gazing (0.2917)
that Weezing is a member of both the Team Rocket Poison Type binary with Arbok, and the Cinnabar Mansion Pollution binary with Muk (0.2917)
not getting circumcised (0.2917)
The Ten Second Rule (0.2917)
Philip Fry's eleventh year of living in the future (0.2917)
loving chocolate so damn much (0.2917)
not sleeping with him (0.2917)
flirting with somebody other than your significant other (0.2924)
tackling her (0.2927)
picking Charmander (0.2927)
sleeping with your best friend (0.2931)
taking the red pill (0.2933)
being a child once (0.2941)
only wanting to see Wolverine because of the hot, hairy Liev Schreiber (0.2941)
every sexual experience you've ever had (0.2941)
your internet name lasting this long (0.2941)
not giving change to what you thought was a homeless guy but was just some dude in need of a shower (0.2941)
driving all day in order to pick up your brother, who is coming home for the summer (0.2941)
wondering how one gets a job as a taxidermist and bone cleaner (0.2941)
not voting for the President (0.2941)
coming from the land of the ice and snow, from the midnight sun where the hot springs flow (0.2941)
rioting with the frenzied mob (0.2941)
using only one pokemon (0.2941)
accidentally setting my balls on fire with a barbecue lighter (0.2941)
using ghee as an intimate lubricant (0.2941)
the flowers that bloom in the spring (0.2941)
peeing in the shower (0.2941)
taking it all off (0.2941)
adding a new regret (0.2941)
going to a tiny college (0.2941)
giving that bum some money (0.2947)
waking up this morning (0.2954)
hanging out with strangers on public transit (0.2960)
eating some vittles (0.2963)
geometry (0.2963)
cutting off your long hair (0.2963)
living drug free (0.2963)
chewing on things (0.2963)
wondering if anyone has the old regret list (0.2963)
pressing that big button (0.2963)
forgetting sarah marshall (0.2963)
homographic homophonic autantonyms (0.2973)
laughing because you suddenly remembered something hilarious, then realizing strangers are looking at you (0.2984)
that there is no such thing as an original sin (0.3000)
believing in god (0.3000)
sex with your best friend (0.3000)
cleaning up after yourself (0.3000)
decimating this pie (0.3000)
not thinking xkcd should get as much grief as it does (0.3000)
stealing Tucksworth's hamburger (0.3000)
looking through all the old regrets you made, using the cache (0.3000)
eating a child once (0.3000)
Friends (0.3000)
the bird being a word (0.3000)
Batman (0.3000)
getting milk faced and humming like rabbits (0.3000)
can mine for fish (0.3000)
that everybody's footloose (0.3000)
stuffing that lawyer in the fridge (0.3000)
white type on a black background (0.3010)
leaving (0.3021)
believing in karma (0.3023)

most voted regrets

meeting Brian Peppers (12561/0.9789)
Kento (2760/0.9993)
turtles (2607/0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (2431/0.0004)
that you're suddenly very interested in the origin of the champagne out of a shoe trope (2336/0.5076)
[ show more ]

most discussed regrets

tricking a straight guy into dating another straight guy (357)
turtles (291)
your boobs buying food on ebay (109)
the death of Sylvia Browne (70)
not getting circumcised (63)
[ show more ]