September 8th, 2010 
if you're concerned how t-rex could be talking about his life in the past tense, it's because in the last frame we actually jumped ahead to a play t-rex is performing in. AGAINST HIS WILL. BECAUSE HE GOT KIDNAPPED. THIS PLOT JUST GOT /TWISTED/

The haps: So, I kinda feel bad for the French Alliance, seeing as we TOOK THEM DOWNTOWN SO HANDILY yesterday. We've now got 100 more people than their precious "Alliance", and almost twice the number of members the ENTIRE NATION of France has. Good work, everyone! We're now the 8th biggest team on the planet.

And here's where we rewrite history, Big Brother style. There was never a war with France. Instead, Slashdot has always been our enemy. We're only a hundred and five members away from overtaking them. From taking them down. From SLASHDOTTING THEM even though that's not really what slashdotting means anyway POINT IS: if you haven't signed up yet, you should! Join our distributed computing team, help cure cancer, and help show some uppity tech news website what REAL websites are made of.

Finally: hooray for all the new members! In terms of computing we're doing, our numbers have more than doubled in the past week. We're doing over a year's worth of productive computing every day. Amazing!

– Ryan

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