T-Rex: Most of Shakespeare's life is a mystery! People spend their time reading his plays and saying "Man, this guy has dudes sailing from cities that are days away from large bodies of water."

T-Rex: "He must not have known geography that well!"

T-Rex: "Therefore... he must not have travelled that much! I HAVE UNCOVERED A FACT ABOUT SHAKESPEARE'S LIFE!" and then they're happy.
Dromiceiomimus: But that's because there's not much we actually know about Shakespeare's life.
T-Rex: That's exactly my point! We're RECONSTRUCTING it from hints, subtext, deduction and innuendo from his works. I CAN USE THIS.

Utahraptor: How?
T-Rex: In my own life!

T-Rex: I'll write plays that HINT at how great I am, how smart and sexy and awesome everyone finds me. Then I just excise every other mention of myself from history, and the plays are the only source left! They're the only way to learn about the towering mind behind them, this Adonis of authors, this... T-Rex.

Off panel: But what if your play sucks and nobody wants to know ANYTHING about its author?
T-Rex: Please. My first play is called "The Motorist Who Spewed Racial Epithets While Also Spewing Vomit"!
T-Rex: (It was inspired by an actual motorist I felt terrible about AND for!)