T-Rex: Cultural universals, like linguistic universals, are properties that are found in EVERY SINGLE CULTURE EVER!
T-Rex: For example: cultures universally have units of time!
T-Rex: And cultures universally consume food and water, which makes sense because otherwise they'd be dead. And cultures universally have beliefs about death and about disease and cultures universally have concepts of both music and dance!
Dromiceiomimus: Universally? Really?
T-Rex: Yep! Scientists looked at HISTORY.
Utahraptor: Um, that's not actually universal, T-Rex! "Universal" means EVERYTHING, not just Earth!
T-Rex: What?
Utahraptor: But you're using it to mean "just on Earth, actually, and um, just within the history we remember". That's RACIST against people from unrecorded history, PLUS it's racist against every other form of life in the entire Universe. Basically I'm saying that you are perilously close to being the MOST PREJUDICED RACIST GUY EVER IN TIME.
Narrator: LATER:
T-Rex: Dear audio diary! I - I must now record the one sentence I'd always thought I'd be able to avoid.
T-Rex: *sigh*
T-Rex: ...Alright. Today I somehow leveled up my racism like infinity times.
