Narrator: EPIPHANY COMICS
T-Rex: Friends are good things to have! They can help you out when you are sad (a psychological benefit), and can lend you money if you need it (an economic benefit)!
T-Rex: It is these positive benefits of having friends that concern me!
T-Rex: I'm pretty sure I like my friends because of the people they are, but what if I'm just kidding myself? What if I really just like them because they're an economic cushion - someone to bail me out, even literally, if I get into trouble?
Dromiceiomimus: Well - I mean, you'd do the same thing for us, T-Rex.
T-Rex: Exactly! We hedge our bets by having friends!
Utahraptor: There are friendships that go beyond this shared benefit, T-Rex!
T-Rex: How so?
Utahraptor: Okay - what about "best friends forever", the people in your life who you'll know will stand by you no matter what?
T-Rex: They are even MORE of an economic benefit! They are get out of jail free cards, people who you can rely on in any situation.
T-Rex: Wait!! My problem's that I'm seeing any positive effect of friendship as income, and thus everyone involved in one as compromised in a conflict of interest. I would only be happy if having friends was awful!
T-Rex: Thanks, rare and brilliant moments of perfect self-awareness!
