T-Rex: We've got the perfect woman, and the perfect man, but you know what we're missing?
Narrator: THE PERFECT DOG
T-Rex: And this one is easy because we all know the perfect dog comes when called, is adorable, likes to snuggle and never poops.
Dromiceiomimus: Where does the poop - go?
T-Rex: Oh! The perfect dog features a stomach that can transform any food into energy at 100% efficiency!
Utahraptor: What if it eats, like, garbage and dirt?
T-Rex: It still gets processed, dude!
Utahraptor: Ah. So the perfect dog is effectively a perfect organic cold fusion reactor, transforming any matter into caloric energy without waste. I'm afraid the government has taken your dog, T-Rex! Its power is simply too great to leave in civilian hands.
T-Rex: Nooooooo!
Narrator: THE PERFECT CAT
T-Rex: Noooooooooo WHO CARES
