T-Rex: Nature is full of cute animals, but most cute animals don't like to be hugged!
Narrator: THE TRAGEDY OF NATURE
T-Rex: Chipmunks look adorable, but those little dudes run away when I try to touch them! And koala bears look like they're so down to hug, but if you hug one they get scared and pee on you! I'VE LIVED IT.
T-Rex: Why did nature evolve to be SO CUTE and yet SO UNTOUCHABLE? Where are the cute wild animals that LIKE to be hugged?
Utahraptor: You're looking at him, baby!
T-Rex: Man! I GUESS.
T-Rex: But it's not the same! I don't want to hug another dinosaur, I want to hug an animal that's smaller than me and cuter than me and that I don't consider to be equally smart.
Utahraptor: Whoah. You got some weird things going on in your head, buddy.
T-Rex: Man, I know it!!
Narrator: LATER, DISAPPOINTMENT REIGNS SUPREME:
T-Rex: WHAT KIND OF GOD
T-Rex: MADE IT SO LIONS
T-Rex: HUG BACK TOO HARD
