T-Rex: Have you written 10 pages of a 15-page essay and you're KINDA DONE WRITING NOW? Don't worry. Lucky for you you took a break and came to me and now you're gonna learn yourself something called
Narrator: HOW TO MAKE ANY ESSAY YOU'RE WRITING LONGER
T-Rex: Don't even mess with "bigger line height" or that other amateur-hour garbage. Do it like the pros do: by copying and pasting your first few pages into the middle, prefaced by "For those of you just joining us," and concluded by "And now, the conclusion...".
Dromiceiomimus: But what if that was obviously the first thing I did and I'm still short?
T-Rex: Then it's time to break out the BIG GUNS.
Utahraptor: Prefacing random sentences with selected semantically-empty interest phrases?
T-Rex: YOU KNOW IT!
T-Rex: Adding "Interestingly enough", "Trust me when I say", and "Though some initial reporting suggested differently, in the fullness of time it soon became clear that" before any sentence EASILY punches up that word count!
Utahraptor: And don't forget adding a few "...or so it appeared"s after your sentences too!
Narrator: CONGRATULATIONS
Narrator: THOUGH SOME INITIAL REPORTING SUGGESTED DIFFERENTLY, IN THE FULLNESS OF TIME IT SOON BECAME CLEAR THAT
Narrator: YOUR PAPER IS AWESOME NOW
