Narrator: HANDSHAKE ALTERNATIVES
T-Rex: Finally!
T-Rex: FRIGGIN FINALLY.
Narrator: TAP ELBOWS:
T-Rex: Pros: Elbow fetishists are living their best lives!
Dromiceiomimus: Cons: Nobody looks cool doing this!
Narrator: TAP FEET:
Utahraptor: Pros: Foot fetishists are living their best lives!
T-Rex: Cons: Also looks bad!!
Narrator: DO THE VULCAN LIVE LONG AND PROSPER GESTURE:
T-Rex: Cons: Star Trek Enterprise wrote the Vulcans weirdly and I'm still mad about it!
Utahraptor: Cons: May be construed as an invitation to discuss Star Trek with people who are still mad about how Enterprise wrote Vulcans!
Narrator: GIVE UP ON THE IDEA THAT WE SHOULD BE OBLIGATED TO TOUCH THE FLESH OF STRANGE PEOPLE WE'VE JUST MET WITH OUR OWN FLESH:
T-Rex: Hi! Nice to meet you!
T-Rex: I regret to inform you that I will not be participating in being colonized by your skin biome today
