T-Rex: A friend gave me some whipped cream yesterday, but it was better than all other whipped cream I'd had...
T-Rex: ...because THIS whipped cream had EARL GREY TEA in it.
Dromiceiomimus: Liquid tea was added to it? Weird. It didn't make it watery?
T-Rex: No, no, just tiny particles of the tea leaves themselves! It made the whipped cream taste EVEN BETTER.
Dromiceiomimus: Makes sense! We already add non-whipped cream to tea.
T-Rex: Right? It was AMAZING.
Utahraptor: Sounds like this whipped cream really made an impression.
T-Rex: It truly did!
T-Rex: Utahraptor, I just found out I prefer whipped cream in a way I didn't even know EXISTED yesterday. What other discoveries await me?? I'm still young enough to be excited about new favourites, but there will come a day when all I feel is regret for the endless missed opportunities of a life lived suboptimally!!
Narrator: THE UNIVERSE WHERE T-REX HAS BEEN LIVING OPTIMALLY:
T-Rex: Yes indeed, my life is the best it could possibly be, which by definition means ALL my failures are out of my control and not my fault! PLUS I get to stand alone in a room and summarize my life out loud to myself ALL THE TIME
