Narrator: HALLOWE'EN FOR PARENTS
T-Rex: Parents! Are you having trouble thinking of spooktacular ways to make Hallowe'en special for your kids, aged 4 to 17?
T-Rex: Wow, really? You are??
T-Rex: Other, better parents probably don't have this problem, huh?
T-Rex: HAH HAH, JUST KIDDING! EVERYONE SUCKS THE SAME. Okay, well, have you tried spooky snacks? Make "blood punch", "monster eyes" or "witch hair"! But secretly this is just pink lemonade, peeled grapes, and spaghetti. I don't know, put the peeled grapes in the spaghetti.
T-Rex: Oh no, so spooky!!
Utahraptor: You don't have kids, dude!
T-Rex: True!
T-Rex: But you don't need kids of your own to spend a lot of time thinking of how to reduce children to abject terror. Wait, that came out wrong. You don't need kids of your own to take a particular, direct interest in other people's little ones. Hold on. You don't need kids of your own -
Utahraptor: T-Rex, please stop
Narrator: SOON:
T-Rex: Got it! "You don't need kids of your own to be a strange adult who is trying to get them to eat something".
Off panel: ...Wow.
T-Rex: Language is HARD, dudes!
